https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Thu, 16 Apr 2026 20:59:39 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1134834 Fri, 10 Jan 2014 04:16:44 +0000 Anonymous 1134834@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you. I needed this. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1134556 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 23:18:40 +0000 Sheila 1134556@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks for posting this. Having had some tragic deaths in my family within the past few years, this article reminded me how someone's presence at a time of loss can remind you of the living, and the hope which that reminder brings when the only feelings you truly have are of your loss and how the pain will never go away. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1134268 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 18:13:29 +0000 Peri 1134268@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>That's a good article, Glory, thanks for sharing it. It is making think of things from a different angle, because it have passed on funerals of acquaintances thinking my attending would be intrusive.</p> <p>An example of what I mean...a professional acquaintance, someone I know but am not really friends with, much less close friends, lost her husband a few years ago. I'm not meaning this was someone I disliked...not a "not friend" , just not a friend either. I thought that going to the funeral would be inappropriate, since I didn't know the husband either. </p> <p>When my father died many years back I was so grateful for my friends who came, but I would have felt uncomfortable if such an acquaintance had come. Someone who hadn't known my father and barely knew me, I'm not sure I would have been happy about that.</p> <p>So, the "always" gives me questions and of course I'm being too literal. I just wonder if someone has some wisdom on where the line is.</p> <p>Also, I'm about to write something that relates to this in an opposite way. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1134035 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 15:01:20 +0000 cuffcat 1134035@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks for sharing this link. I know that doing what's right is greater than my own fears. My parents always told me that funerals were for the living. I agree. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1133853 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 11:26:14 +0000 TraceyLiz65 1133853@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>A great reminder! &nbsp;My husband whose parents are toxic still receive cards and phone calls on holidays, birthdays and the anniversary of his brother's death. More than that is not healthy, but I greatly admire that he continues to reach out and know his father at least appreciates it.... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1133842 Thu, 09 Jan 2014 10:56:02 +0000 Debra 1133842@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It is difficult to know what to say sometimes, but something is always better than nothing </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1133251 Wed, 08 Jan 2014 22:40:56 +0000 Echo 1133251@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Modern society has marginalized death and illness to the extent that many people have no clue how to deal with it. There is so much focus on what makes you happy, or making money, or obtaining more stuff - people actually do studies to determine the "happiness index" of different places - that we try never to even<i> think</i> about the other side of life. And when people are raised that way (NOT going to the funeral), they truly and genuinely don't know what to do when someone they know or love is ill or in need, so they check out. Denial is much easier than facing the difficult parts of life.</p> <p>I think the important message in the article for me is teaching my children that illness and death are a part of life, much like the author's father taught her. I need to instill in them a responsibility to face these things instead of burying their heads in the sand, and I need to teach it by example.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1133166 Wed, 08 Jan 2014 21:37:03 +0000 Anonymous 1133166@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>It is a great reminder. Thanks for posting. I'm reminded of the bible verse that says to him who knows to do right but doesn't do it, to him that is sin. I'm loosely quoting because I remember the KJV version of the verse, which sounds rather archaic to some, though it's what I prefer. At any rate, the idea is that doing the right thing is very important, and we should all remember that. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1133154 Wed, 08 Jan 2014 21:31:37 +0000 Caro in Oz 1133154@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Great reminder Glory thanks :)</p> <p>For the more epic occasions I try to&nbsp;remember this&nbsp;quote too:</p> <p><b><a rel="nofollow" href="http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/e/edmundburk377528.html"><u>The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.</u></a><br /></b><br /><a rel="nofollow" href="http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/e/edmundburk377528.html"><b><u>Edmund Burke</u></b></a><b><u>&nbsp;</u></b></p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1132933 Wed, 08 Jan 2014 18:46:15 +0000 ramya 1132933@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I am one of the people who never know how to deal with sickness and death. Thanks for reminding how important it is to push aside what I feel. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1132921 Wed, 08 Jan 2014 18:39:07 +0000 Emily 1132921@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you for this, Glory. &nbsp;Those small gestures can be easy to put off but this is an excellent reminder of how important they are. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1132897 Wed, 08 Jan 2014 18:10:35 +0000 kkards 1132897@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>my dad always lived this way, he always had a kind word, helped out friends and his community, and never asked for anything in return. in the last 2 years of his life, as his health was fading, it was incredible to see the support that he and my mom got back in return. its not always easy, but i do believe that we get back what we put in. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1132727 Wed, 08 Jan 2014 15:27:25 +0000 viva 1132727@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This post reminded me that today is the anniversary of my nephew's death. I cannot thank you enough. Now I will make the time for the very difficult but really necessary call to my sister-in-law. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1132701 Wed, 08 Jan 2014 14:53:08 +0000 LACeleste 1132701@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>An important reminder. &nbsp;Thank you Glory. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1132692 Wed, 08 Jan 2014 14:36:34 +0000 Suz 1132692@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you, Glory. It's a powerful and moving reminder to us to do the right thing. Not always easy.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1132658 Wed, 08 Jan 2014 14:07:53 +0000 Anonymous 1132658@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thank you for reminding us of this. I got to the end of the link fighting back tears, but the author is so right. Sometimes we have to ignore the inconvenience or awkwardness and just do it. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/always-go-to-the-funeral#post-1132639 Wed, 08 Jan 2014 13:45:22 +0000 Glory 1132639@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>This is an old article but it resurfaced some months ago and struck a chord with me. I am not sure if it is impactful to the same degree for others. For me and my story -&nbsp;My youngest daughter was born with a serious health issue which put her in hospital for her first 6 months. She was gravely ill.&nbsp;Many of our closest friends dropped out of sight. Too tough to deal. I spent loads of time being upset and angry about it. It was so hurtful. And, those people are still absent now, some 11 years later. &nbsp;So I try now to remind myself to always do something, say something - some small gesture.&nbsp;</p> <p>Here is how the author explains it.<br />""Always go to the funeral” means that I have to do the right thing when I really, really don’t feel like it. I have to remind myself of it when I could make some small gesture, but I don’t really have to and I definitely don’t want to. I’m talking about those things that represent only inconvenience to me, but the world to the other guy. You know, the painfully under-attended birthday party. The hospital visit during happy hour. The Shiva call for one of my ex’s uncles. In my humdrum life, the daily battle hasn’t been good versus evil. It’s hardly so epic. Most days, my real battle is doing good versus doing nothing."</p> <p><a rel="nofollow" href="http://thisibelieve.org/essay/8/">http://thisibelieve.org/essay/8/</a> </p>