https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone Style Advice for Fashion Lovers en-US Mon, 20 Apr 2026 18:24:41 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 q https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/search.php https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1994141 Sun, 20 Jan 2019 04:12:10 +0000 Anonymous 1994141@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Parents probably will not ask for help, even if they need it. See them often and be sure that they are eating healthy and paying their bills. Be on the watch for scams that they may fall into. My dad really thought he had won Publishers Clearing House. He was also double and triple paying bills and thinking that Medicare statements ( Not A Bill) were bills and frequently got lost driving in a small town where he had lived in the same house for decades. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1993546 Fri, 18 Jan 2019 16:52:49 +0000 kerry 1993546@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Thanks Laurie!</p> <p>I took a look to see if that book is at my local library, Janet, and it is! I’ll check it out. I’m not sure how ‘difficult’ my mom is/will be but I’m sure it’ll provide a perspective I hadn’t considered. Thanks! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1993511 Fri, 18 Jan 2019 15:04:14 +0000 Janet 1993511@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Kerry, I remembered this book while responding to Laurie's thread, and I thought I would mention it here. I found it very helpful when I was going through tough times as my mom got older. It helped me be more patient and present with her, and gave me some strategies for dealing with challenges. Not sure if it will resonate with you, but I thought I would share just in case.&nbsp;</p> <p><a rel="nofollow" href="https://www.amazon.com/Coping-Your-Difficult-Older-Parent/dp/038079750X/ref=asc_df_038079750X/?tag=hyprod-20&amp;linkCode=df0&amp;hvadid=312031138203&amp;hvpos=1o3&amp;hvnetw=g&amp;hvrand=16236617536317266844&amp;hvpone=&amp;hvptwo=&amp;hvqmt=&amp;hvdev=c&amp;hvdvcmdl=&amp;hvlocint=&amp;hvlocphy=9007845&amp;hvtargid=pla-564167034711&amp;psc=1">https://www.amazon.com/Coping-.....50X/?tag=h</a></p> <p>Sending continued good vibes! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1993322 Thu, 17 Jan 2019 23:15:14 +0000 Laurie 1993322@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Hi Kerry - just wanted to acknowledge your post and your loss.&nbsp; I've started a thread on aging parents, inspired by the conversation here.</p> <p>It's so hard!&nbsp; I wish your Mom all the very best in finding fulfillment in her independent life.&nbsp; &nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1986484 Fri, 28 Dec 2018 23:13:29 +0000 kerry 1986484@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>texstyle, good idea about getting the house in top order. I know she has some plumbing issues to deal with but I think she has that sorted and will get in done in a few months. I’ll ask her if there’s anything else and if she needs help with it.</p> <p>unfrumped, thanks for your advice. I’ve discovered through recent conversations that she’s planning to become friendlier with her two neighbours, both are women living on their own (one to each side of her). They’ve both reached out to her and she’s planning on having them over to build that relationship more. This gives me some reassurance. </p> <p>Gretchen, my mom’s now identified one of those neighbours as her 3:00 am phone call so that’s good. Thank you.</p> <p>ChrisM, I asked her about the medical alert fob and she was not a fan. She felt she wasn’t old enough for it!</p> <p>Elle, good idea to put me on the accounts if it comes to that. I’ll ask her. I know she did that with my stepdad years ago (they had separate accounts). </p> <p>gryffin, thank you so much for your thoughtful advice. It really helps! My mom is definitely CEO material! I agree that listening and empathy are what she needs most right now. Thank you for helping me keep that perspective.</p> <p>kkards, nice tip on Amazon as a resource. I’ll look into it!</p> <p>Bijou, oh I agree! She’ll definitely want to stay in her house but I also don’t want to assume anything so I’m slowly asking everything and anything right now. I haven’t broached the living arrangements topic. Not sure if and when I will. I’ll be patient and see how she feels. My mom went through a similar situation with my grandmother years ago as your family did with your dad. Yes, it definitely does take its toll. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1986349 Fri, 28 Dec 2018 18:05:54 +0000 kkards 1986349@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>very late to this but what i was going to say Gaylene said, and so much better than i could have...<br />on a practical note, not sure if Amazon Canada has services, but here in the states, its an easy an almost painless way to get a handyman in to do jobs around the house. I've used it for things like changing the smoke detector and the garbage disposal, and long distance booked someone to take care of some small projects at my moms.&nbsp; </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1986295 Fri, 28 Dec 2018 15:12:01 +0000 Bijou 1986295@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Kerry if your mother can look after herself then she should chose how to live and whether to stay in the same house. I had the issue that my father (who has Parkinson's) was very infirm and forgetting to take his medication, which also impacted his cognitive abilities wanted to stay in his house despite not being capable of looking after himself. It took his doctor to refuse to discharge him from hospital unless he went into a care facility - but meanwhile - his care took a massive toll on the family. My older sister almost had a nervous breakdown trying to cater to his demands. My advice to you is to also prioritise your life and know what you are happy and want to do for your Mum but also what you don't want to do. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1986276 Fri, 28 Dec 2018 14:06:02 +0000 kerry 1986276@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You’ve all given me much to think about and I really appreciate it. I know there will be no single course of action going forward. It is my coping strategy to gather resources and research when I’m feeling uncertain and all of you have helped me by providing that support.</p> <p>Aquamarine, I realize that what works for my mom in the next few years may not continue to do so as she ages. I just hope that I’m paying enough attention to know when the status quo needs some tweaking.</p> <p>Jane, do you live close to your mom? How old is your child/children? I’m just trying to figure out logistics of seeing my mom weekly. </p> <p>My mom is definitely a CEO type. Having said that she sometimes get confused when complicated things are explained. But she’s good at asking questions!</p> <p>Gaylene, I agree that my mom deserves my trust and respect. Absolutely I will take her lead (I always have!) on what she needs and if and where she needs support. Everyone’s situation is different and I know everyone here is sharing their own experiences but the idea of wrestling control from my mom over her affairs is hilarious at this point. She would have NONE of it even if I tried which I know better than to! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1986261 Fri, 28 Dec 2018 13:22:56 +0000 Aquamarine 1986261@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Much wisdom from Gryffin. My dad passed 5 years ago, and Mom lives alone in a big house at 82, but I am 5 minutes away. She is legally blind and fiercely independent, so we’ve had some battles because I tend to swoop in and take care of things but she needs to feel in charge. It’s been a tough adjustment, especially since as she’s aged she’s starting to forget little things or even toss a random bill because of her vision. It’s a constant adjustment as we move forward...things are always changing so I guess my advice is to just be there for her and take her lead as much and as long as possible. It’s uncharted territory as our parents live much longer than *their* parents did. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1986247 Fri, 28 Dec 2018 11:42:51 +0000 Jane 1986247@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My dear father died in 2010, after a long illness. Much loved and missed.&nbsp;My mum is fiercely independent too, and I have found the best support is a regular meet up. In the summer this is a weekly Sunday evening supper. More recently, we have both joined Weightwatchers, which has been good fun. It is Saturday morning, and we go for a coffee and croissant after. DS school send out daily prayers during Advent and Easter, and I ping those onto my mum, really to let her know that I am thinking about her. She has a lot of friends, lives in a village that she has lived in for 35 + years, so is probably in a good place to manage living on her own.&nbsp;</p> <p> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1986188 Fri, 28 Dec 2018 03:44:33 +0000 rachylou 1986188@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Yes, that’s a good point that Gaylene and Gryffin make. My mum is the CEO type, runs rough shod over everyone actually (hehe), and it would never even occur to me to try and baby her or make decisions for her. But if she were different, I could see how it might be easy to forget an adult is an adult... and how that would be a bad approach... </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone/page/2#post-1986167 Fri, 28 Dec 2018 02:10:55 +0000 Gaylene 1986167@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>As someone who has gone through a similar situation with my mom, and now find myself in your mom’s age group with a hubby who is a decade older than me, I’d pay attention to Gryffin’s wisdom. </p> <p>Listen to your mom with your eyes and heart, as well as your ears, to find out what she needs from you, but don’t be too quick to act before you’ve consulted her, especially since you know she is fiercely independent. As Angie and Gryffin have so wisely pointed out, your mom needs time to grieve the loss of her partner and to figure out how she wants to move forward. Simply being there for her while she works through the process is probably the best gift you could give her at this point. Despite good intentions, you won’t be able to eliminate the pain and dislocation she will be feeling in the next few months. Keep in contact, but don’t turn it into surveillance. </p> <p>Unless you have tangible reasons to assume your mom isn’t able to cope with her new circumstances, leave it to her to figure out how she wants to live the rest of her life. Support her, but don’t try to wrestle control away from her. The last thing she needs right now is to have to struggle with you to maintain her sense of herself as a capable, functioning adult. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1986141 Fri, 28 Dec 2018 00:35:57 +0000 Stagiaire Fash 1986141@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Another way to track her driving, if necessary, if she doesn't want a medical alert fob, is to get a tracker for her car. They are inconspicuous and not at all expensive. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1986109 Thu, 27 Dec 2018 21:09:03 +0000 gryffin 1986109@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Kerry - I’m so very sorry for the loss of your step dad. I’m in the same boat just a year farther out. We lost dad last November. It’s very difficult. First question, I’m assuming your mom is physically in good shape, as in can she perform all tasks of daily living? Does she drive? Can she walk her dogs or does she have in a fenced in back yard? Can she manage check book; banking, arranging for home repairs? My mom was a queen. Daddy did everything. My mom barely sorts the mail. I had to review everything dad did and then figure out who and how those tasks would be fulfilled. This contrasts to my MIL who was CEO and took care of my FIL and could manage completely independently. You want to try and create a support group of workmen and services if needed. I do call daily. We encourage independence. You are fortunate your mom is independent by nature. Also you can’t fill your step dad’s shoes. No one can. My best advice, is try and be a safe harbor. Encourage mom to vent and tell you what she’s feeling. But don’t rush in to fix things. Too often we assuage our guilt and sorrow by action. Sometimes the best kindness is to listen and empathize. Many times people don’t want suggestions, tasks, plans, no matter how well meaning. They want to be heard without judgement and with patience but without agenda or plan. Being that safe harbor is the hardest task I’ve ever done. My name should be little miss fix it. But sometimes we can’t fix things. Sometimes the best we can do is simply be there. If that makes any sense. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1986097 Thu, 27 Dec 2018 19:53:24 +0000 Gretchen 1986097@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I’m so sorry. There are a lot of great ideas here. Can I add 2 more? </p> <p>1. Do you have a close friend, or someone more your age close by who could be your extra set of eyes? Your mom may not even tell her close friends what’s really going on. But having someone you know who could drop by every now and then and check on her/the house could help. (We had a close family friend who developed Alzheimer’s but we didn’t realize how advanced it was until we visited her at home.)</p> <p>2. Can you identify some one as the 3am call? For many people who live alone, the late night health problems are scariest. Is it time for a hospital trip? How will I get there? I’d feel silly calling an ambulance but I don’t think I can get there on my own... Planning ahead for a friend/neighbor to be on call can give you both peace of mind, </p> <p>Sending comfort to you both as you go through this transition, </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1986074 Thu, 27 Dec 2018 18:19:55 +0000 Elle 1986074@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I'm so sorry for your mom and you.&nbsp; My dad died when my mom was much older (84) and she needed help with finances, taxes, and the paperwork of the condo.&nbsp; She put my name on her bank accounts and I ended up handling the finances long distance.&nbsp; I called or skyped every day and she did agree to see a social worker for grief counseling.&nbsp;&nbsp;</p> <p>The hardest thing for my mom was that she lost her main social contact so I got her to go to the YMCA to swim and just seeing people and exercising helped.&nbsp; Since your mom is younger, one idea would be encourage her to go to some kind of exercise class or join a mall walking group.&nbsp; At 72, she may feel too young for a senior center but if not, they do have good classes.&nbsp;</p> <p>It was also important to visit my mom regularly so that I could observe whether she was depressed (she was), eating correctly, etc.</p> <p>One final and very important thing - take good care of yourself.&nbsp; Being a caretaker (even temporarily) can be very difficult </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1986050 Thu, 27 Dec 2018 17:17:28 +0000 ChrisM 1986050@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>One thing you might also consider is a medical alert fob. If she falls or becomes injured, she can press a button for assistance - the attendant can call 911 or help with medications - and (this was especially important for my mom) I can track where she is on my phone as long as she wears the fob. Truth : she doesn’t know I can track her, and I don’t often look to see where she is, but I can see that this might be a helpful feature. Her driving is scary - even in the small city that’s she’s lived for decades.</p> <p>I live 3 hours away from her - and I’m the closest family. It costs me about $25 a month, and the peace of mind it brings me is worth every penny.</p> <p>Best wishes always in your journey. We all travel this road one way or another - peace to you. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985974 Thu, 27 Dec 2018 12:54:00 +0000 unfrumped 1985974@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>So sorry!<br /> Hopefully she will share with you enough for you to know how you can help, and agree with checking on whether she can manage the “ basics” or needs help right away— does she understand their accounts and bills so can stay on top of that. If generally yes, she might still appreciate your sitting there while she does some things. If you are able to visit it helps you also “ see” if she is functioning ok at least on the surface and offer to do things rather than wait for her to ask. If she has friends her age, there may be things she will share with them rather than a daughter ( and daughters don’t always understand this!) so having some other social or church contacts is important. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985841 Wed, 26 Dec 2018 16:01:13 +0000 texstyle 1985841@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>I agree with calling daily or if not every day at least most days at first. Just a reminder someone is thinking of her. I think if she has friends at church or other places she will do better. Social interactions always help. Maybe be sure to invite her out to do something active a few times a month. Getting the house in the best shape possible is also a good idea - though contractors are a real challenge to find for most people. A house inspection might be a good idea. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985773 Wed, 26 Dec 2018 03:37:06 +0000 Carla 1985773@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>You are a good daughter, Kerry! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985772 Wed, 26 Dec 2018 03:33:11 +0000 kerry 1985772@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Joy, this a great list of practical points to consider. I will refer to your list when making a master list for myself to help guide me where she may need support. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985771 Wed, 26 Dec 2018 03:30:25 +0000 kerry 1985771@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Absolutely suntiger, he was her best friend! She told me today that she goes in his room and talks to him. That makes me happy and sad all at the same time. </p> <p>Gigi, you make some great points about her volunteering and being active. Also about having friends visit on a rotating basis. I’ll have to try and figure out how best to do that.</p> <p>Suz, yes my stepdad used to do a lot. He hadn’t so much in recent years so she already has some supports in place. I’ll definitely make a list of those things and check in with her about them on a regular basis. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985767 Wed, 26 Dec 2018 03:23:39 +0000 kerry 1985767@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Barbara Diane, you make an excellent point about appreciating what we have when we have it and not take it for granted. I will try to be more mindful in my gratitude going forward.</p> <p>Fashintern, I’m so thankful that my mom is on top of her finances - it’s one worry I don’t have. And I agree with you that Angie’s post is lovely!</p> <p>Runcarla, from reading your post I looked up online what was on offer at my mom’s local seniors. Lots! At minimum she’s going to join billiards and she already goes to “Thursdays at 10” where she can hear someone speak about an interesting topic. I wish she played cards but she loathes it! Could never get her to play cards with me as a kid! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985766 Wed, 26 Dec 2018 03:13:52 +0000 kerry 1985766@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh such wise words! Thank you so much.</p> <p>I think calling daily will become the new norm. I don’t think my mom’s depressed but I’ll keep a look out as I know everyone grieves differently and on a different timeline. I think the hoopla of the holiday season has kept some things at bay that might creep in after the holidays.</p> <p>Unfortunately I can’t go stay with her for an extended period of time as I work full time. She’s here now staying over for Christmas. Maybe I’ll ask if she wants to do that some weekends just because ...</p> <p>It’s reassuring to hear stories of other family members that have lived alone after losing their SO. </p> <p>Janet, your experience with your mom sounds both heartwarming and overwhelming. You make an important point about how everyone needs something different and it’s important to pay attention to that. I will try. I will try too to be gentle with her and me. My mom and I have always been close - I’m an only child. But since I had my daughter I have felt a drift. </p> <p>Classically Casual, my mom does have friends I’m just not sure how much she shares with them. She’s quite private but I sense a opening in her as she’s aged. I should just ask her about it. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985752 Tue, 25 Dec 2018 20:13:52 +0000 Stagiaire Fash 1985752@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p><div><i>And doing something regularly outside of her house also.<br /></i></div><div><br /></div><div><i></i>Good point--until her late 80s, my grandma regularly played piano for the people in the old folks' home. <br /></div> </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985745 Tue, 25 Dec 2018 19:29:02 +0000 Barbara Diane 1985745@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>My mother in law was a similar age when my father-in-law died. My sister-in-law looked for a larger home with a separate space for her mother, but she, who had never spent a night alone, stayed in her home. At first someone spent the night with her (child, grandchild) but eventually she was ready to be on her own.</p> <p>DS's aunt was a similar age when her husband died. She ended up managing fine, but she called her daughter to come take the trash out. It was just to the end of the hall in her building. Her daughter said, mom, I'm not coming over to do that. You can do it.&nbsp;</p> <p>Setting up a regular time to see her at her home, so you can see if she is too depressed to be keeping things up, etc. would be a good idea. And doing something regularly outside of her house also.</p> <p>What I see from friends is that there is a loneliness, but also something nice about putting yourself first. And one's financial situation makes a significant difference.&nbsp;</p> <p>I worry but can't imagine going through this. But it has been with me as my husband could have died when he was 48 and needed bypass surgery. Just this week I've been realizing how much he does, the little things, like, he's walking into the kitchen, would you bring me back my water glass.</p> <p>Everyone responds differently. Some find a new partner and some swear to never go through that pain again.</p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985662 Mon, 24 Dec 2018 21:05:40 +0000 Stagiaire Fash 1985662@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p> <div>You've received a lot of good advice already. I don't have experience with this, but have thought about it a lot, as my parents are around 80 and have very different needs. <br /></div><div><br /></div><div>One thing my mom has done that yours might want to do is meet with a financial advisor who specializes in helping older women get their affairs in order. Many have not managed the family's finances and, like my mom, had a lot to learn. <br /></div><div><br /></div><div>My grandmother lived alone for 30 years, until she was nearly 90, after my grandpa died. I graduated college and started living on my own during her last years. Her advice was to always make myself a proper meal and set the table. I find that attitude of self-respect and -care applies in many other areas of life. I got a Christmas tree every year, wore nice undies, and usually had a little garden during the 2 decades it was just me. <br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Married women often say that they are "single moms" if their husbands are away for a few days or weeks. Drives me crazy, as one who is actually single. They catch up the laundry when hubby returns, leave the broken screen door for him to fix, and generally live in a way that is connected to having a partner. Your mom might start falling into that pattern too, particularly if your dad traveled occasionally. It is a different mindset. You might need to gently guide your mom from "weekday 'single'" to actually on her own. If you aren't going to hang the shelf yourself, there's no sense waiting for someone else, because no one is coming unless you arrange it.<br /></div><div><br /></div><div>Angie, that's a lovely post!<br /></div></p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985646 Mon, 24 Dec 2018 18:24:00 +0000 Carla 1985646@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lots of good advice here - for you, and your mother. I would second joining the Seniors Center (for 55 and up $15 for a year at my local place. ) Tons of activities and groups. Also, just perusing the bulletin board is enlightening. One - off day trips to the Big City for special events or just shopping. Techno-buddies youth volunteers to teach you how to maximize your iPad, cel phone, etc as well as trouble shoot. Monthly drop in psychologist/counsellor. Folks looking to share housing/set up co-housing. It's a happening place! </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985592 Mon, 24 Dec 2018 15:16:19 +0000 Janet 1985592@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Oh I’m so sorry. Rachy is right, nothing can fill that hole. All we can do is listen and be there and help in ways that are useful to that particular individual — everyone is a little bit different.</p> <p>My mom was 63 when she lost my dad. She lived to be 80, so that was 17 years of living on her own for the first time in her life. The good thing is that she was incredibly organized with their affairs and finances, so it was seamless to keep operating the house and budget as she had been doing. </p> <p>The not as positive thing is that mom struggled her entire life with depression, anxiety, agoraphobia, and panic attacks. She was deeply introverted and didn’t make new friends easily. Her two closest friends and her husband all died before she turned 65. She had no close family.</p> <p>As a result she leaned very heavily on me. My sister lived 800 miles away, and mom didn’t travel, so I took care of helping mom with everything she needed around the house, etc. It wasn’t always easy — I would get 2am phone calls during panic attacks — but I tried my best, and she appreciated everything I did. I had to make sure I found balance in my life too, especially after I got married and felt pulled in two directions by two sets of emotional and physical demands. </p> <p>I guess I’m telling you all this in order to let you know it can take a toll on everyone involved, sometimes in unexpected ways. But I f you can define boundaries for yourself and act with love and generosity for both you and your parent, it can be rewarding. </p> <p>I encourage you to be gentle with both you and her, and to take your time deciding on any changes in living situation, etc, if that’s what she needs. My mom was determined to live on her own for the rest of her life, and she did just that (in a four bedroom house with a yard and all!). I nudged her to downsize, and we looked at some small condos from time to time, but it just happened that she never made the move. </p> <p>I’m sending you both good wishes and hugs. Let me know if I can help. </p> https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/topic/advice-for-mom-living-alone#post-1985591 Mon, 24 Dec 2018 15:14:42 +0000 Classically Casual 1985591@https://youlookfab.com/welookfab/ <p>Lots of good suggestions already. Here’s one more thought....does your mom have close girl friends? Your mom is my age. I know of women who have formed tight social groups over the loss of spouses. They do lots of activities together and do what needs to be done to support each other. Some things get shared with close friends that doesn’t get shared with family. Ideally your mom will have both. </p>