Oh, Ms. Mary, you have my sympathy! Over the past few years, my sisters and I have been through similar upheavals with our elderly parents. Over and over, just when I thought no solution existed, someone or something would come along and keep everything going awhile longer. When my father died (at 97) we moved my very frail mother into an assisted living place, and for the first time in years I slept without anxiety. Knowing that she is checked on every few hours, given the right medication at the proper times, cheered and encouraged to eat by the very caring staff, has made a huge difference in all our lives. I'm sure that, once the condo is sold and the paperwork is wrapped up, you'll experience the same peace of mind. Meanwhile, enjoy those thoughtfully prepared meals and hang in there!

I am sorry that you've been going through such stressful times. It sounds like you are doing the right thing, with good support. Take care and big hugs.

Mary, I am so sorry that you and your parents have been going through such a stressful time. Good for you for hiring help with the move; it is difficult enough for you without having to pack and haul boxes, too. I wish you and your folks strength to get through this, and I hope the assisted living facility helps them maintain their frail health better. My thoughts are with your family.

Mary, I'd been wondering what happened to you. Thanks for taking the time to update us. I hope you are able to take some time to recharge now and again during this stressful time.

I sincerely hope that your folks aren't fighting you on this move and recognize in their hearts that they can no longer live on their own. [My 90 y.o. mom is engaged in magical thinking and somehow believes that one day she will just drop dead. No mom; with your falls, forgetfulness, bad sight and hearing, something truly bad will happen and you will have to go to skilled nursing.] I'm glad you've had a bit of help from your son, the support of your man, and that you haven't had to battle with sibs regarding your decisions.

Hang in there. I admire your efficiency, but please don't re-injure yourself!

I hope that things will settle-down for you very soon and life will return to its 'normal' pace.
Take care of yourself as best you can in the meantime!

Blessings on you and your family, Mary! Your care for them is a credit to you. I'm glad your son is helping out, and you have someone to share the burden with.

Mary, I'm late to this, but I'm wishing you all the best coping with this. It can't be easy for anyone involved, but thank goodness your parents will be back together soon! I'm so glad you have support from your amazing son and your new friend.

And it comes as no surprise at all that you are a WONDERFUL daughter. Your parents are very fortunate to have you caring for them. Big hugs to you all!

I have been there and done that, and know exactly what you're going through. It's tough, isn't it? I hope you'll be able to cope and get through this. I'll be thinking about you and your family during this difficult time.

Thank you for sharing that. Such a difficult time. Sorry it took a meltdown to lead you to the epiphany of the need to engage relocation help. These services provide amazing help to people. There are several in my town and they are beyond helpful in the sorting, packing, lifting etc. Well worth it. Take care of yourself and your parents. Best wishes for the next stage. Hugs.

Mary my thoughts are with you - My Father lives with us and I really understand the journey you are going through as we have had some recent health scares.
Glad you were able to find a place close and a company to help - When we moved my Dad out of his house to live with us we used a similar company and they were a God send.

It's no surprise to hear how quickly you've handled this. Good luck and strength to you in the next few weeks getting your parents settled.

I've just returned from a long visit with my 94 year old parents who are still in their own home; they will probably soon be starting with visits from home health care workers. We're all very fortunate that my brother moved to their town last year to be able to offer them more help.

Oh, ladies! Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all your love and support!

Things are moving along as well as can be expected. My mom and I met with the lady from the relocation company today, and we have a plan in place. It's going to cost a small fortune but I think it will be well worth it. We measured the new place and all the furniture, and we have a plan for what to take and how it will be laid out in the new place. We will be packing Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, and will move my mom into the new place on Thursday. My dad will follow when he gets out of the nursing home.

I am going to New York City with my gentleman friend on Memorial Day weekend, and that is what is keeping me going!

Thank you again for all the good thoughts. It means the world to me!

Such a difficult time and what a brilliant solution to have help with someone who specializes in such events. Kudos to whoever started such a company.
The good news is that the answers are all in place. Hope you get some rest and glad you have emotional and support of two wonderful guys in your life!

Miss you lots, Mary. Have been in this mess with my husband's parents for the last 18 months and you are very blessed to have cooperative parents who have funds - it's amazing the complexity and cost and emotional toll that this takes, and it's always sudden and extreme.

I face it in the next years with my folks, and hope the lessons learned help, but they probably won't - it's a singular assignment.

Your son came home just in time, things are happening for a reason.

Much support and a big virtual hug.

PS Being able to look fab through all of this is a gift from Angie and this forum, it cannot be overestimated for sure. xo.

Big Hugs!!! I am so glad you were able to find that outsourcing place. What a relief! Please, take good care of yourself through all of this as well.

Prayers and blessings of renewl strength and rest be with you and your family's as you travel this new journey.

Thinking of you Ms Mary. I have been through similar situations with aging parents. These are stressful times. How fortunate you found a good place near you. Enjoy your weekend in NYC.

Just checking in to say I hope the plans for your mum's move are progressing well. Stay fab! xxx

Good progress, Mary. Sending healing thoughts to both your parents and hope that both boys are looking after you. Much love.

Big hugs and my thoughts are with you during this stressful time. I am glad that you got help from the moving company, that sounds overwhelming to manage! Your parents are so cute together. I am glad you could find a solution that would work for them so they will get the care they need. Best wishes for their health.

Coming up for air to thank you all again for your support!

I spent Monday weeding through all their clothes. They are reducing their closet space by half, so I got a bunch of skinny velvet hangers to save space. I also tossed out anything that was worn out or stained, which turned out to be about half of my mom's wardrobe and about a third of my dad's. I was amused, though, to see that they both have nicely color-coordinated mix-and-match wardrobes!

Yesterday the relocation company came and packed up the boxes while I filled half a dumpster with trash. Today the moving van picked everything up and I am waiting for the call that they are in my town so I can go over and help unpack. More unpacking and setting up tomorrow, then I will go get my mom and she will sleep there tomorrow night.

Meanwhile, we are trying to get my dad moved to a facility closer to here.

And in the middle of all this, I found out this morning that I screwed up and scheduled my Memorial Day getaway for a time when I am supposed to be on 24-hour phone duty for work! Argh! It will work out but it's been embarrassing and stressful! So I went out and did a little retail therapy and it was a nice break!

Thanks for the update. You are being such a support...and obviously learnt some capsule skills from the folks!!

We all make these scheduling mistakes...there is always a solution.

Mary, so sorry that you and your parents have had to deal with this. It's so tough, but really smart.
My late grandpa moved into assisted living a few years back after my grandma passed, and it was clear he couldn't take care of the house in his own. It was really hard on him and the family but so worth it, despite the expense, to know that necessities from laundry to food to cleaning, and also calling for help when medical emergencies occurred, were taken care of. My aunt arranged a senior relocation company too, and they did a great job not only moving stuff but setting up furniture, art, etc. in his new place.
The only downside is that at the end of his life he had to move again upon entering hospice so that he could be in a facility where more medical care was provided. The second place was actually even better. Their staff was so compassionate and personable to him and to us. Both places offered lots of events, games, movie nights, and concerts. My dad still volunteers to play concerts for the last place my grandpa was at.
I hope that the staff and services at your parents' new place will be as good a fit, and that it eases the burden on you and your dad. Best wishes for the move.

You have my sympathy and admiration for how you're handling all this. My mom insisted on staying in my parents' home in the mountains four hours north of me for nine long years after my dad passed away, and one day after she finally moved to a senior apartment five minutes from me she said "I should have done this years ago." (Head, bang, wall). I did all the house-sorting and planning and rebuilding her home in a tiny apartment (down to the pictures on the wall in the same places) and it darn near killed me. Like the poster above said, the first night she was in her new place was the first night I'd slept without worrying about her in years. It's a very stressful transition but one that's worth it. Good luck to you all.

It just dawned on me that you've been missing--I haven't been here much lately.

So sorry that you are going through this. I have been through it--although it was a few years ago. Dad was 90 with Parkinson's and Mom 88 with worsening dementia. We'd tried to get them to move into assisted living, but they wouldn't budge. Finally my Dad fell and broke his hip. Luckily I have two sisters, brothers-in-law and the younger generation to help. Getting them packed up and moved out of their house was a nightmare--they lived in the same house for 62 years.

So I understand some of the challenges. It is a difficult time. You are lucky you found a place for them near-by. I looked at assisted living places for several years and even that is a challenge. I had no idea there was something like senior relocation services.

Please take care of yourself, Mary. I hope you get a chance to take a breather now and then.

Your posts always cheer me up! I look forward to seeing them again.

I'm so sorry to hear that your parents haven't been doing well. My thoughts and prayers are with you at this difficult time.

Reporting in from the other side of the move: Mom is in her new assisted-living home and says she loves it. Dad is just a few blocks down the street at a nursing home while he finishes his antibiotic treatment. Hopefully after the staff and doctors there have had a chance to evaluate him, he will be allowed to have a "day pass" and at least go see the new place where my mom is.

And I am blissfully back to my job, at which I have worked only three days in the past three weeks. SO HAPPY to have some semblance of normalcy again -- especially after this past weekend. Saturday I spent the whole day running between them -- three visits each to Mom's place and Dad's place! Yikes!

Edited to add a photo of Mom and Dad and my sweet son, taken on Mother's Day.

Thank you for the update I glad everyone is settled and your back in your groove sort of. Great family pic love the smiles. I hope your smiling to.

Oh Mary...I'm so sorry for all that you are going through. I know first hand how hard both emotionally and physically it is to take care of these details with an aging and disabled parent. Thank goodness you have some support from your son:) know that my thoughts are with you and sending good wishes and a big hug!

Good to see everyone looking so rosy cheeked and happy in the pic and glad to hear everyone can breathe out a little bit I know the running back and forth.