Well, it happened... - YouLookFab Forum

My husband and I knew for awhile that the consultant at his job was vying for his office and wanting him to go do sales and not management.. Yesterday it happened... The most shocking thing for me is how systematic this toxic man has been with the absent owner's son-in-law who is running the company...
He has beaten the guy down to nothing and is now fully in charge of the company.. So much so that when my husband asked about keeping his company truck... The consultant answered that they would look at it's value and come up with payment plan for my husband to buy it... My husband's boss ( the now beaten down man) look dumbfounded , but said nothing.... That truck was his personal truck before he gave it to my husband and took another company vehicle for himself... I can't believe the arogance of this consultant... I could write an entire book about the lies, manipulation and absolute brainwashing this toxic, narcisstic consultant has done , but will spare you...

DH is wavering between this is ok, (getting away from the crazy making the consultant has been doing) to deep depressive mood of the huge responsibility on his shoulders with two kids about to head off to college.. There are so many little expenses needed that add up and the big one of taking our daughter to Boston...

The good news is that he is a fabullous salesman and might not be an issue at all if there wasn't a marketing problem with the leads right now... He rocked it when he first came to this company 8 months ago and if he just does two deals per pay period we can manage our bills, he already has one, It's not unreasonable to think the can get succeed with doubling that minimum and have 4 sales... Praying for peace for my husband's wounded heart so he can get the job done!

With just 76 days til our Ireland trip, this is a big punch in the gut... Think it's time for hubby to find a new company, but the idea of taking 3 weeks off afer only being there a short time doesn't sit well. The momentum of training for a new job doesn't make as much sense as just being a machine and making as much ,money as possible before the trip..

Thank goodness we have this trip to look forward to... Just sitting down and writing this all down relieved my stress.. If anyone feels like adding us to thier prayers, it would be greatly appreciated...

9 years ago

Suz

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Veteran

Sorry to hear this, Tracey - it sounds like a lot of stress. I'm glad you have your trip to look forward to.

Janet

Sending good thoughts. It does not sound like things will get any better there, so your husband seemingly has two options. Put his head down and plow through his job, or take steps to make a change. Or possibly do the first while mentally gearing up to do the second.

I know a lot of people who have been through the same thing. If the company owner is vulnerable enough to cede control to the consultant, it's unlikely things will ever get better there. I would encourage your husband to put out feelers for a new position. It just sounds miserable. I've worked in toxic environments, and it sucks your energy. Best of luck to you all!

Alexandra

Hugs and good vibes!

Transcona Shannon

Tracey - I'm so sorry about this. There are few things as stressful as unhappy work situations. Best of luck to you and hubby

Eliza

All the best to your husband and family. This is so stressful. I try to think about circumstances like this as providing the opportunity for the right match to be found over time. Sorry for this burden.

Gigi

I'll be praying for you, that you and your husband can discern what ultimately to do in this situation.

SW Ann

Oh, gee...that totally stinks! Praying for your hubby and you to find the right action next....Not to be a "pollyanna" but I've found that repeating the saying
"Things always work out for us" generally helps me get through the anxiety attack. You will figure out what to do, but you don't have to do anything RIGHT NOW. Breathe......breathe......

kkards

so sorry your husband, and by extension, your family so going thru this. please know that i am thinking of you and sending prayers and positive vibes your way.

rachylou

Well, I say congratulations. Y'all enjoy being free. Your husband did his duty and gave it the ol' college try. Now can he can go off and make better use of his time than spend it on a company with a strong attraction to failure.

Not to mention, sometimes I talk to this homeless guy. He says to me, *Today's been a win. I'm still here.* I find that to be the real reality.

Anonymous

Oh dear. That's sounds traumatic. I'll be praying for your family!

carter

So frustrating when some pathetic boob messes with your life! In the immediate aftermath, I find it most beneficial to me to NOT make any key decisions. Instead, I make a detailed short term plan that will keep me busy and focused enough to let my subconscious do the sorting. In this instance, I may make a very aggressive action-oriented sales plan for the weeks until vacation. Vacation is the perfect time to work through the results of your subconscious work and make a plan for going forward. Post vacation is a great time to eagerly work the new well thought out plan. Thoughts and prayers are with you and hubby.

Thistle

First, I hope your husband is putting together his resume. It is very unlikely this environment will change. So, time to move on. No one deserves to be in such a toxic environment. He will be happier, and so will the whole family, when he finds a place he fits with.

Depending on his level in the company and what he is looking for, it can take a many months to find the right position. Now is a good time to start using his network to see what's out there, get his resume polished, and start interviewing.

As for the car thing, well, if the company doesn't provide a company vehicle, then they are obligated to pay mileage for any miles he puts on a personal vehicle for company business. Current iRS standard is 56 cents per business mile. This is why companies give sales people company cars.

http://www.irs.gov/2014-Standa.....-Announced

Susie

Oh Tracey I am sorry that what you had predicted has come true. It's so disappointing after how excited you were about this opportunity.

it is true that it is often easier to find a job while you still have one. It sounds like the best course of action might be to focus on making sales for the very near future and also to start working his contacts and seeing what else is out there. I agree that it could prove difficult to start a new job before your trip.

anne

So sorry to hear that his initial high hopes have been dashed. You have received some good advice here. Hope this won't cloud the holiday.

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