I wear a lot of things that aren't widely loved here and I don't love a lot of things that seems people just do backflips over and scramble to copy.
Mad pattern mixing
multiple colors in one outfit
flats
thrifting
converse tennis
graphic tees
Doc Martins
uggs
plaid anything
printed pants
stripes
bright tights
denim in popular bright colors
And I am sure many other things that just don't work into my style...I am totally ok with that, I tend to not follow the large crowd in any aspect of my life, particularly fashion:)
Not that the gals here don't look fab in all these, but I won't wear them just because they are loved on the forum.

"I *only* accept/seek ideas that will EXPAND my choices of what to wear, how to wear it.
I don't take on any opinions that would contract my choices. "

Couldn't have said it better, just beautiful!

Since Uggs is mentioned so often, I have to chime in. I think they are adorable and cute. Unfortunately for these reasons I do not want to wear them. I live in a cold winter climate and I don't know if it is because I see them on children and teenagers or the slush and salt marks on them just make them look sloppy. It's hard to look polished in a salt-stained pair of boots.

I have somewhat similar thoughts on what is more widely worn and popular here. But I have to say, when I posted my long weekend of WIW in Miami a few months back, I realized upon further inspection it included absolutely all the no-no's lol! Maxi dress - check. Denim mini - check. Flip flops - check. Corduroy pants - check. Short shorts - check. Short sleeve tee - check. And I felt FAB all weekend long!!
guess all I was missing was the Uggs and a hoodie in the mix

Elisabeth, despite all the posts saying nobody will tell you what you should wear, and that there are no rules, you have hit upon how culture works: lots of inchoate rules based on what the key figures and then the majority are doing. So I agree with you there are YLF rules, even if nobody ever states them!

Because of this, I think it's important to approach your own outfit posts with a very clear sense of what you value, aspire to, or simply like, before you start processing other people's feedback. Know that it's human nature that no matter how objective people try to be (and some people do a surprisingly skilful job of this) we view the world through the lenses of our own beliefs and experiences.

I have experimented enough with outfits to know a belt will nearly always make me look worse, that ballet flats stumpify me, that delicate shoes will make my calves look bigger. I know my own preferences enough to know I won't be comfortable in low vamp pumps despite their leg-lengthening properties. I know my own community well enough that when a poster here told me my shoes were too informal for an event, I trusted my instincts and wore them anyway - and got killer ratings from the real life people around me.

I think recognising the unspoken rules is important, otherwise I would have been thrown for a loop and taken advice that doesn't really work for me. I applaud the fact that you do.

Now go out and have fun with fashion, and remember what Vildy said, and also what Una said about shifting the culture by making yourself visible in it (love this idea, thanks Una!) ^_^

Elisabeth: Boots, esp. tall boots are very popular here. I live in a mild climate and never got in the habit of wearing boots. My very nice classic boots must have been hiding in the back of my closet for years and years (don't remember buying them) until I unearthed them this past fall. I tried (once) tucking pants into boots; didn't like the look. I had to force myself to wear them a couple of times this year.

You will never find me in a tunic or flowy top; they are stumpifyingly wrong for my proportions. I am firmly in Team Tuck, Team Scarf, and mostly in Team Belt.

I love jeans with unfashionably high rises and comfortable shoes that look too much like potatoes.

HOWEVER, I am willing to push my own style limits as long as it doesn't physically hurt. (I'm pretty sure that Fryes are too narrow for my bunioned feet. Sniff, sniff.)

This place seems to be great for getting feedback on whether something fits -- when our own emotions blind us because we like something so much. I love the variety of styles, ages, shapes, and sizes of women here. I also love the WIW a year ago and now -- because I get so intimidated by the *perfect* stylers, and it is reassuring to see that a year ago or more they might have had 8s or 9s instead of perfect 10s. Although I think that certain trendy items and looks are popular, I have always had the feeling that alternative styles are supported.

(Thanks, Bella).

This thread has helped crystallize my thoughts on a very difficult blog post I am writing about style. Stay tuned.

I want to keep my response here short and simple:

- do not exclude

- have an opinion

I do not want people to feel uncomfortable because they perceive certain items to be frowned upon. YLF is about all types of style preferences and personas (that is clear from the WiW's that are posted here). Of course, people will have their opinions, (I personally have strong opinions), and they will also be respectfully stated and heard. There are plenty of items and outfit combinations that I find very stylish - but do not win the hearts of the majority of this forum. There will always be instances like this in fashion and style.

I have not really ever been aware of things that are encouraged and things that are not - perhaps, I'm just not paying attention. To me YLF has just been about having fun.

The thing that initially attracted me to YLF was the acceptance of all different kinds of styles and looks. I think that Angie's "Team ? or Team ?" is a good example of the permission that we get here to have our own preferences. I also have found that when Angie writes about new trends or options nf how to dress, that it is done in a tone that is permissive to try or reject her suggestions or recommendations. When someone posts a WIW, if they do not ask for suggestions or opinions on something specific then I make a point to never give them any suggestions or opinions - I will only comment about the outfit - nothing more than that. I think that as more and more people post pics on the site, that it will only enrich and expand everyones' views and ideas of what it means to have fun with fashion!

This has been a very interesting read for me. I love You Look Fab with my whole heart but i will admit to feeling this way before. Posting a WIW of a maxi skirt or a pair of short shorts and at the same time thinking, "eeehh...they're not going to like this.". But you know what? Every single time i have been blown away by positive comments. I mean heck, i posted about wanting a Spirit Hood (i never ended up getting one btw, too many middle schoolers now rock them) months back and even found a few friends. Your outfit it may not be everyone's cup of tea or style but never ever have i posted a look and received 0 feedback or negative feedback. I think this is what makes our community great.

So i say, wear and post what you love. You might be surprised at who ends up liking the look. At the same time be open to constructive criticism if there is any, to help your style become even better.

*shhhhh, don't tell anyone* but I think Uggs are cute, too. I remember seeing a picture of Kate Middleton before she was the Duchess of Cambridge, she was wearing skinnies, Uggs some kind of floaty tunic with pretty earrings and her long hair flowing and I though, "Ooooo, I want a pair of those!"

Thanks Fruitful! Shifting the paradigm is my goal in life. "Indian women are submissive." NOT! "You're way too old to wear that." HA! "Rock climbers don't wear lipstick." PUCKER UP!

All joking aside, this is what I've learned through my struggles - if anyone thinks YLF style is not "your" style, you can change that by posting your outfits. For instance, people who might think short skirts can't be worn by over 40 can look to Mo now. People who are not in the UWP tribe will still point out items they spy for those who are. Sometimes a little step is all it takes... And I can't tell you how much fun it is when someone who already has a strong and new to me/different sense of style comes along!

Angie and the whole community here are entirely unique in my experience for making this place so utterly civil, tolerant and welcoming.

(Sorry, just read the Hunger Games trilogy and am obsessed with the idea of a small gesture starting a revolution!)

Fruitful is right; every community forms unspoken "rules" and mores.

And Una's right, too. Active participation shifts the paradigm. And this culture is one that is very open to shifts and readjustments.

And you know what they say; rules are meant to be broken.

Lots and lots of great thoughts and insights shared here.

Just one thought to contribute and, as always, you're free to take it or ignore it as pleases you but I would use 'conventions' instead of 'rules' when I'm looking at certain YLF style factors.

I think it comes from my mathematics background and what 'rules' mean to me (i.e. *shaking head in sorrow* All those lovely math 'rules' are NOT meant to be broken

On a slightly different note, I have thought in the past that we (or I) may be developing YLF-influenced "eye" for certain items. So that when I see someone wearing orange this spring I might think "how current" but the rest of the people around me might just wonder "why is she wearing orange?"

Maybe color is not a good example since most people who keep track of what is available in stores will at least be aware of which colors are popular this season. But something like two-colored oxfords, column of denim, or color blocking, for example, are not the looks I would have appreciated before YLF. So if I put together an outfit using these elements, I can expect to find a warm reception here but I sometimes wonder whether the people around me see it with the same eye.

By the way, back to your original post, I too figured out that belting or tucking rarely works for me so rarely do it. I did discover the use of belts under cardigans to create illusion of a waist thanks to YLF, though. Some things I have always liked (bright colors, stripes, flats) have been reinforced by YLF. And some things I never plan on trying (like denim on denim for me), even if I might like it on other people. I do think that for me the most valuable aspect of reading this site is finding how to better put together outfits that work for my taste, not someone else's, although my taste may be affected by reading YLF (or fashion magazines) as well.

When I see someone wearing flip flops, I think of the poor people in Central America who wear them because they can't afford better shoes. To me, flip flops are at the bottom of the barrel fashion wise. Besides that, they aren't comfortable.