So scared, dumbass me :(

biscuitsmom

I've had a really rough day, found out I am 2 points away from severe kidney failure, which didn't help, but doesn't excuse me for being so STUPID!!!! Neighbor kids come over , supposedly to 'play' with Angel, but were much more interested in looking over our house - not that we have a lot, but DAMN, I AM smarter than that! Just caught me at a verra bad time....We don't have a security system, but should invest in one. Hopped the fence easily, really interested to hear she is a pure-bred, I told them she is a mutt, she looks like it. But WTF is wrong with me? Besides everything? I grew up in the city, lived most of my life knowing better, but the 'BE POLITE' thing just took over, even though I DAMN WELL know better I'm just shaking....

8 years ago

Off Topic

13 replies

Latest reply was from JenA

Sal

Veteran

Sorry to hear that BiscuitsMom. Perhaps tell them that Angel is fierce? And actually being polite can be the right thing to do - they probably know that you are on to them.

Sit down, have a cup of tea, it does sound a miserable day indeed.

8 years ago

claracluck

Active Member

Oh you poor thing i think your feeling really vunerable at the moment the kids are probably just being curious and nosey plus they know you have a dog that will be loyal and protective. You are not stupid! I agree with kiwi sit down with a cup of tea and take a moment,please be kind to yourself,is there a friend you can call to maybe come and sit with you for an hour? If not please post again so we know you are ok.

8 years ago

Anonymous

Polite can also be a display of confidence, and hostile can escalate quickly so it sounds as though you did the right thing, you're probably disturbed because of how unexpected and destabilizing the whole interaction was.
A security system sounds like an excellent idea, for all kinds of reasons, I really hope you go through with it, I don't know anyone who has one and regrets it, it just eliminates a whole area of anxiety.

8 years ago

Peri

Veteran

Do you know your neighbors? Can you go talk to them and tell them you are uncomfortable with the kids coming over without an invitation? Unless the parents are real crooks...unlikely...they will be mortified and jerk their kids right in line.

How old are the kids anyway? I know you are very upset for so many reasons, but this one will probably not turn into the problem you are worried about.

8 years ago

rachylou

Veteran

What happened! What did the kids do?

8 years ago

Maneera

(website)

Veteran

Please calm down. You're in a very vulnerable frame of mind right now, and that's the only reason this scared you so much. Most dogs are very cued into their owners feelings, so know that if things went south and you had to scream for help, even the most docile of dogs responds to the stress by barking and lunging at the stranger. I've experienced it many times with my own dogs and know that while they are happy to wag their tails and play with neighbours, a scream from me puts them on guard even against people they otherwise know well and see regularly.

A security system is a good idea though. Don't read too much into this and please don't feel stupid. This could happen to any one of us even on our best of days, and here you are going through so much physically and emotionally. Please be kind to yourself.

8 years ago

Eliza

Veteran

Biscuitsmom- please don't be hard on yourself. So much can seem out of control as medical situations unfold. I know this feeling and it made me jumpy in many unrelated scenarios; all the knobs are "turned up" . Try to be as kind to yourself as you would be to someone else going through this. Sorry for how hard this is.

8 years ago

biscuitsmom

Veteran

Thank you all so much, I really appreciate the kind and wise words.... no, don't know the parents, and they are not at all friendly. Ive walked Angel around there, said hi and was ignored. They live 2 houses away. 2 of the kids were very young, 5 maybe? But the older boy was about 11-12, said he had to use the bathroom. As soon as they came in, he started just looking everything as fast as he could, even asking if that was my phone. I showed him the bathroom, he closed the door and then came out ( no toilet flush) and I saw he jumped over the puppy gate and was standing in the middle of our front room- nowhere near the bathroom. They left, I went into the bathroom and he didn't use the toilet at all, just opened all the medicine cabinet drawers (they stick tight when you close them and they were all slightly open. ) I'm sure he was looking for any (pain) prescriptions, as they know I need a cane. I'm terrified that they might try to steal Angel, who would let anyone pick her up/go with them I never worried about Biscuit, he would not let anyone touch him. I never leave her alone outside when I go somewhere, but she wont even bark if someone knocks, or if she hears noise outside....thanks for caring

8 years ago

Anonymous

It's possible they'd been put outside to "play" and were just curious but this all sounds pretty invasive, and if they're going to be on summer vacation they might be prowling around more often. You were distracted and they caught you off guard but now we're moving past that now. Next time, no letting strangers in the house. Start with "no" as the answer and then work your way back to "polite" however you can.

Say the dogs are unpredictable, or that the house is a mess and you don't want to take any chances on word getting out that you're a terrible housekeeper, or you have friends coming over and you need to start cooking, etc. And then smile, say goodbye, and shut the door.

Security system! Security system! Does not have to be fancy or wildly expensive!

8 years ago

abc

Veteran

Breathe and try to relax.

If you are at all routine driven consider changing up your routine to throw off anyone that may be observing you.

Consider a security system but know crooks can circumvent them and depending on where you are police may not respond as fast as needed.

Be firm. No one inside the house from now on. Your house, your rules. Period.

Don't worry about offending someone or not being nice.

If you feel threatened don't hesitate to call 911.

We are here for you.

8 years ago

Peri

Veteran

I still want to comfort you. Kids that age, it really seems like a case of rudeness, lax upbringing and poor supervision and not so much a case of scoping out the joint. I think you have every reason to be upset, but don't need to worry as much as you are. What is most likely to play out from here is that they will be pesky little nuisances, not thieves.

But...everything the others said is true. You have no obligation to put up with these pesky little nuisances and every right to expect their parents to keep them out of your property. If you can't go yourself, is there anyone else who could intervene for you? Or mail a letter. The parents, friendly or not, need to be told that their kids are not to come over uninvited and you will not be responsible for them if they trespass.

8 years ago

Maneera

(website)

Veteran

Oh my, I find my heart aching for you. Fear that someone might want to steal your puppy is horrifying, and sadly, it happens all too often. I completely agree with Abc. Do not allow anyone you don't know inside your house.... Ever. It's ok to be rude...you're just looking out for your best interests. If the kids ever lurk outside again, make sure they know they're not welcome on your property. And don't be afraid to call for help.

Don't worry about Angel. Soon she'll grow up and not be so vulnerable. Until then, I'm so glad that she has you to protect her. Be strong.

8 years ago

JenA

Veteran

You poor thing, sounds like you are very overwhelmed right now.

I don't think the kids are a threat to you. But it's ok to feel uncomfortable since the kids did something that isn't quite normal either. And if the parents aren't friendly it just shows that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

The kids are an annoyance that you'll need to deal with by not inviting them into your house ("can I use the bathroom?" your response "No, not today" or "toilet isn't working" ... they live close enough to go home). Changing your schedule is good too. Put timers on some of your lights. You can get them at target and they are super easy to use. And by all means get a security system if you can.

Most important, tell the kids that, "you are so happy that your puppy has a micro chip so that if he runs away or if anyone takes him, you'll be able to find him no matter what." Even if he isn't, it's a huge deterrent. And perhaps it might ease your mind if you do it.

Big HUG!!

8 years ago

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