(Because my mom reads my Facebook posts

No, it's not about my mom-I don't want her feeling bad. 3.5 weeks ago I was in another bike accident--4 years ago I fractured my shoulder. No one else was involved that time. This time I was cut off from behind (by a fellow cyclist--this was on a bike path) without warning and slammed to the ground. At first it was immediately painful, of course, but I was glad that I hadn't broken anything. The brunt of the impact was around the joining of the hip and the butt. The other guy asked if I wanted an ambulance. I said no, never thought to get his information and went home.

The pain from taking steps has gone way down. It got better within the first week or so. The overall discomfort has kind of plateaued, and in fact these past few days I'm suddenly feeling very stiff and tight. And the deeper pain in my upper thigh area is still around, not getting that much better. For example, when I am putting on pants in the morning, putting all my weight on that one leg is not sharply painful, but unpleasant. The leg is so weakened.

Once I'm up and walking I do ok. I can even dance (tango-my hobby). I tire more easily but I manage.

But getting out of a car? Standing up from a chair after sitting for a while?i feel like an old person.

I went to the primary care doc after the first few days. He gave me an overall checkup, gave me muscle relaxants and prescription ibuprofen and I have no concussion (though I'm having occasional headaches now, which I never had before. I'm monitoring it for now.)

With my last accident the injury was much more immediately severe, and I ended up needing six months of PT. but I feel somehow more depressed about this. I just feel damaged, and anxious at not knowing if I'll get back to the way I was, or always have a slight limp and a weird walk.

As you can imagine I'm not biking now (I did go out for a trial ride in my neighborhood a few days ago). It's not that I'm afraid so much as I'm now very distrustful of other people. It's one thing being hit by a car (this happened to me too--actually I've had *three* accidents total since starting cycling in Boston 6 years ago). I've really lost my trust after being hit from behind by an idiot cyclist on a safe bike path.

I'm feeling like it's a matter of time before I'm severely injured or killed while city biking. A woman in Cambridge was killed this past week; two women cyclists in San Francisco died while biking legally and cautiously.

Urban biking has become part of my identity. It's been fun, not to mention that it's healthy and free. I'm not really interested in the sport of cycling outside the city.

I am just hoping that two months from now I'm walking without a weird sway, my energy level's back up, and I'm in a better mood.

On the surface I'm doing a lot to keep busy, see friends, I'm still taking my private tango lessons and I have a light class schedule. My calendar is fairly full with upcoming weekend trips and activities, and I like my unscheduled time anyway.

It's a first world problem, but I'm feeling pretty down at times each day.

Sorry if you've read all this and are feeling down as well. : ( I just wanted to unload Ina somewhat private space. Xoxoxo