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Hair regrets

annagybe

(website)

Veteran

I'm due for a color touch up later in the week with a tweak on my hair cut. I finally figured out how to style it. But now I'm not sure if I'm so enamored with it anymore. But I know it will be a serious pain to grow out, especially the baby bangs.
It's probably part and parcel with a lot of other stressors in my life which is contributing part and parcel to major dissatisfaction. Right now I don't think it's really doing anything for me. I'm already weird enough and I"m not sure this cut helped.
I miss my longer hair.

On a another note it's unusually hot in Seattle so I tried to find some cheap shorts at Target on Sunday. Size ten was massive camel toe. Size twelve was better but still rather dromedarian.

General

29 replies

Latest reply was from Thistle

Marlene

Veteran

for what its worth, I like the bangs. I am going to strongly suggest that you don't embark on a new hair journey while you are feeling glum. I always change my hair when I'm glum and then regret it. Then I am both glum AND growing out my hair. Not a good combo.

Shorts always suck, regardless of the size. I have no idea why they make shorts so awful....its like they add in extra weirdness when they are designing them. I've decided I will wear skirts this summer for this very reason.

Adelfa

Veteran

Anna, I know the feeling. Once I got a pixie after a major life stressor and I hated it so much. With my short neck and broad shoulders, I felt like a football player. However I learned from this. Never again in the 35+ years since have I been remotely tempted to get a pixie. You have learned that you feel good in your long hair!

I won't say it will grow out before you know it because that's what people say to me about the arrival of my first grandchild in November and I say NO it's forEVER! But a new insight into what you like is worth something.

I say this not knowing (remembering, lol?) what your new cut looks like. Just talking about the feeling.

rachylou

Veteran

I guess it hasn't held up - it was really nice the way it opened up your face. I didn't like the Target shorts either. I don't like shorts in general, but one pair is useful... but nope. Way too squeezy.

CocoLion

(website)

Veteran

I looked back on your started conversations and the latest photo I found was what you wore to brunch with Jenava, the gladiators + shorts + crop top. I love your hair shoulder length with the bangs. It looks like a cut that needs quite a bit of upkeep though. I suggest looking at that picture (where I think you look great -- fun cool girl and NOT weird), maybe you just need to shape your cut again to get it where it should be. If after a trim you still don't like it, you can think about a change. I just think you need to give this look another chance.

Archer

Veteran

Ditto Cocolion. Easy to see everything as wrong - when you convince yourself it's all wrong - it is. Your hair looks great in the last photos and I know you don't like to hear it but it has always, IMO suited you really well in a loose up-do too.

tulle

Veteran

Annagybe, I've been refreshing my memory of your haircut with a look at your last few WIW posts, and first I want to say: You have the most gorgeous, perfect skin I've ever seen. Really, like Marilyn Monroe's skin, it seems illuminated from within. If I were you I'd reveal more of it . . . but maybe not on your forehead. As one who has felt the impulse to get those short bangs from time to time (like every time I watch Roman Holiday) I have learned to lash myself to the mast until the feeling passes. They are very hard to wear unless you are: about 20 years old, with straight shiny hair, living in Brooklyn--or Audrey Hepburn. The good news is that, if you stop cutting your hair, the bangs will be to your eyebrows by the end of the Summer. I would love to see you in long soft bangs and wavy, grown-out hair (the color's great--I'd keep that up for sure) because it's such a sexy, happy look--one that would suit the shape of your face and your curvy body, too. I know you like a slightly tougher, hipper esthetic, with ironic twists, but I see a luscious, porcelain-skinned, retro beauty who also deserves some time in the spotlight.

If this feels like a creepy lecture from your clueless aunt, please ignore it!

Sal

Veteran

I like a fringe/bangs, and have always wanted one but because of my cowlicks have avoided them. So I have a real soft spot for a fringe with long hair, so do bear that in mind.

You do have very lovely hair skin and eyes and I think the fringe sets them off so well. I really don't see the haircut as weird, but modern and stylish.

But if it is not working for you then I get that....and the wonderful thing about hair is it will grow longer on it's own and can easily be cut shorter!

Style Fan

Veteran

Anna FWIW DH and I went shopping for shorts on Saturday and came home empty handed. Why are shorts so hard to find for men and women?

Bangs grow out pretty fast. 1/4 inch makes a big difference. I have been wearing bangs for a few years and they are a major upkeep.

Astrid

Veteran

I think your hair looked great in your recent pictures, so I also vote to proceed with caution. Maybe it's just the mood your in? If you are sure you want a change I second what Tulle said.

Style Fan

Veteran

I looked back to see your hair. I can see it would require a lot of upkeep. My bangs are major upkeep. The length has to be just right and the shape has to be exactly right for the shape of your face. No wonder I drive 2 to 3 hours to get my hair cut.

I agree with what others have said about not doing anything to your hair when you are feeling glum. Enough said. No need to show pictures of what I have done.

Traci

Veteran

I think what you're missing is variety. You love to mix and change things up constantly and go for the unexpected. After a bit this unexpected haircut has started to feel expected to you.

See if your stylist has some ideas on ways to mix it up. It may require some extra length. Crazy idea...what about some clip on bangs for when you're feeling more classically inclined?

cheryle (Dianthus)

(website)

Veteran

First, you are not weird. You have a unique flair that many people just don't understand. If you really don't like the hair then find a pic of something you do like and ask your stylist to work towards it. If you are just disenchanted with life generally, then perhaps just get a maintenance cut and wait a few weeks to decide.

It really sucks when you feel that all aspects of your life are unsatisfying. We all go through those phases and they are tough. Hang in there. It will get better.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

I suspect Traci may be onto something, as you are with your comment about other things spilling over into the feelings about the hair...I know when I am really stressed I tend to feel worse about some aspect of my appearance and often it's the hair. Plus, summer can be brutal -- changes in weather and humidity make hair harder to manage. I really like the fun cut you got; it's funky and cool -- but I can see how you might quickly tire of it or miss a certain adjustability.

So sorry that life is treating you badly now. It makes everything so much harder.

But you look beautiful.

And to heck with shorts.

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

I think your haircut as seen in your latest pictures looks great and not weird, but why not just let it grow out a bit and decide when you feel more inspired. As mentioned above, bangs grow out pretty quickly and every bit makes a difference in your look.

Daria

I can only echo others to not make any major decisions regarding your hair until your mood improves a little.
And Target shorts are awful this year - I think I've tried them all and they all looked weird on me, even though I'm pretty slim.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Anna, you know I love your new 'do, but you have to love it too. I do think that your down mood is affecting your perspective. That's understandable and more hugs to you.

May I suggest talking to your stylist about it. I'm sure you'll reach a viable solution on how to go forward. And keep us posted.

Jeweled

Veteran

Whenever I have a shorter haircut that I loved at first but am hating a month later . . . it usually turns out to be a case of the hair having grown too long to work with that style now. If I get it trimmed, I'm happier with my hair again - because now it looks good in that style again.

I hope you find your hair happiness again soon!

Marilyn

Veteran

I agree with the others that making changes when you are feeling glum....especially to your appearance....is not always a good thing. I've been feeling out of sorts as well....I'm blaming perimenopause....and I really regretted trying to change up my hair a few months ago. So, I've grown it out a bit, got a trim last week, and I'm just leaving it for now until I feel like myself again.

Anonymous

Anna -- I wanted to post earlier, but I wasn't exactly sure what to say. I can say that I understand the desire to cut your hair during periods of extreme stress. It just seems "so right" at the time. And sometimes it does work out. Sadly, other times it does not.

I am sorry that you are not loving your new hair style. Perhaps talking to your stylist might yield some options. Once I wore a really pretty headband until my hair grew out. It took months, but it was a solution.

Wishing you the best.

Kirstjen

Veteran

OMG the camel toe comment made me spit & laugh at once. At least you recognize camel toe. I have a sister...

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Bummer that you're not enjoying your hair right now! I agree that it may have more to do with all that's going on in your life than just the hairstyle, because I do think it's a pretty cool look that suits you well. One other thought: in the summer, my style takes on a slightly more boho/casual look, and I don't style/straighten my hair so much, so a less structured look just sort of happens in the summer -- it's not necessarily my favorite look for me, but I can only do so much blow-drying when it's 95 degrees and I'm washing my hair every day (no way I'm skipping that when I'm swimming or biking every day). I wonder if your summer style might be feeling a little more at odds with the strict bangs? At any rate, I hope you find the right answer and feel fab again soon!

I have a hair appointment next week, and I'm going to just get the cut and color refreshed; I still really like my latest cut, and I am grateful to you for the inspiration!

Aida

Veteran

Aw sorry you're feeling this way Anna! FWIW I'm in the group that finds the cut particularly fun and flattering for you, it really shows off your beautiful eyes and opens up your face. Perhaps keeping up with the baby bangs might take a little more time than you've got to give to it right now? I know things have been a little hectic for you. Another thought is that maybe the heat is making it feel a little less bearable; I've been wearing mine up a LOT more than I'd expected to so I'm not particularly enjoying my "cut" right now either!

(Poodles to the Target shorts. I haven't been able to find anything there in the last year or two, and yet my sis has had amazing luck. Roll of the dice, I guess! My best shorts recently have come from consignment/thrift stores.)

elissa c

I like your hair as it currently is but if you're looking for something different, I would ask your stylist for ideas on how to tweak what you already have. Hair stylists see a lot of different clients and often have a good sense of what suits people.

As for shorts, I give up. The ones that are supposed to be age appropriate on me all look dumpy and hit at unflattering points on my leg.

donnat

Veteran

I think you hair cut is very flattering. Don't let cheap target shorts get you down. You are far more stylish than that.

Sal

Veteran

I used lots of foul language and deleted so many pics of me over summer in shorts. I cannot get them right, I do not know why. Truly the line between too frumpy, too short, too tight is very very thin....I liked your sailor shorts on you very much so at least you have one pair of decent ones. I hate shorts shopping so much I prefer bra or swimsuit shopping.

Love the dromedarian term though....

krishnidoux

Veteran

Anna, I love your hair. It is cool and rocker chic. I love how it frames your face.

Have you thought of darkening it a little? I think it would look terrific with this haircut. Also, don't hesitate to get yourself some styling paste so you can play around and shape it. It's the perfect length to do so!

In your pics, we can't see your eyes. But I bet the new do has opened them up. It would be the perfect occasion to play around with your makeup: more emphasis on the eyes, less on the lips.

Have you tried wearing earrings with this look? I think longer, thinner earrings would look good.

Also, you have a very cute figure.

I find that right now, fashion is at a weird point in terms of the way some jeans and shorts fit at the waist and hips. The higher waist sometimes make the garment too tight around the thighs. When I shop, I find myself between two sizes: when it fits the thighs the waist is too loose, a problem that can't be solved with only a belt, now that waists are higher. So it's definitively not you, it's the fashion industry that forgot to do the high waist thing correctly.
I really dig your sailoresque black shorts.

approprio

(website)

Veteran

I too am a fan of the bangs. Maybe if we all shout loud enough it will convince you that they look great on you. No?

And you can do better than cheap Target shorts. The fit is their problem, not yours. I like a boxer style because the stretchy waist lets you adjust the rise, but they're hard to find in smaller sizes. ASOS Curve has some nice ones but they start at 14.

jackiec

Veteran

Boy it sucks to feel in a bad place, but I love that you keep your sense of humour. Dromedarian - I'm so stealing that one. Good luck on your hair journey. I know the frustration. You have such an innate sense of killer style that I know you'll figure it out. Shorts are a nightmare. My best have an uber wide elastic waist and are ultra slouchy. I never had a chance to comment on your off topic post. But FWIW, I'm 42 too, and it seems everything has gone to pot all at once. As my doctor says (and he said it in Dutch), when you open the box you're going to find something....or in my case, 4 or 5 somethings.... I feel like we sail into 40 with excitement, then it all falls apart. Try to stay positive and I hope things are looking up for you.

Thistle

Veteran

I can't say I've seen your new hairstyle, so I'll have to check back on your other posts. I can only say the first time I cut my long hair to a bob, I cried for two days. Everyone kept telling me it looked good, but it didn't matter because it wasn't *my* hair.

I did eventually get used to it, and I learned to like it. I still grew it back out, though.

I do wonder if the other stressors in your life are contributing to this, though. Wishing you a safe and short path through your troubles.