Aziriphale wins this month's YLF prize for richest threads!
I actually wanted to add re the writers and artists thing -- there are, admittedly, writers who write and don't care if they publish. I guess those ones would be equivalent to those who dress ONLY for themselves.
And there are others who write ONLY for audience -- they're strongly externally motivated and won't write unless they are published (and paid). Wasn't it Dr. Johnson who said that no man but a blockhead ever wrote for anything but money? (But that may have been a comment on how hard writing is, vs. a comment about a need for audience.)
It fascinates me how differently we experience the world! And how personality and character play a significant role in our responses. For instance, like Gaylene and Thimbelina, I have been a teacher and been subject to the stares and comments of a relatively large audience on a daily basis. I agree that this is quite different from most public roles in that the same largish group of people see you every day for a long period of time. Meanwhile, each believes (with some reason) that he or she has a "special" relationship with you (after all, this is part of what teaching is about) and may feel entitled on that basis to comment on your clothes, in a way that we ordinarily don't comment, except maybe about true celebrities.
I got lots of unsolicited comments on my clothes, my hair, my jewellery (or lack of it), my footwear, my specs, my skin and eyes. And most of those comments were not flattering! But they tended to roll off me, somehow...it's only now that Gaylene mentions it that I remember. It's just not an area of major sensitivity for me. Whereas I probably remember every single critical or even mildly unflattering word someone has made about my writing...
Yet I still put that out there, too...
As I was falling asleep last night, I thought of another parallel to YLF that might explain this.
While I write (and dress) mostly or primarily for myself (and would continue to do so, even without any audience at all) -- I do better with an audience.
Offered a contract, a deadline, a commission -- and an editor I trust and respect -- I produce more and better writing than I used to do back in the days when I scribbled away in my lonely garrett, with no expectation of publication, ever.
Well, I dress better when I'm confident of an audience, too. Maybe that is why I post WIWs. I feel more encouraged, emboldened, supported -- less alone in the project. And that frees me to be more experimental, or more true to my own desires, or...something.
Of course I always have my "at home" audience -- the people I love (whose opinions I value more than anyone else's.) Plus the real life strangers and acquaintances who see my outfits. But those strangers and acquaintances -- why should I really value their opinions? They aren't necessarily educated, thoughtful, contextualized. The YLF audience is a much better informed audience. Along with my loved ones, they're an audience that matters.
It's like this with my writing, too. I value or take seriously the opinions of some parts of my audience more than others.
Whose opinions do I value most? Two types: People who are engaged in a similar project. (I.e. other artists). And regular readers -- people who simply read the work and feel moved, without necessarily being able to parse out why.
In other words, not self-styled critics, but "fellows" -- if I can use that word in a non-sexist way. Comarades? Companions?
You are all my "fashion companions."
