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bf makeover!

cyan45

please help! what are some classic, comfortable pieces to increase my dear bf's fashion sense?

currently, weekdays consist of khaki/dress pants, short-sleeve button down shirts, black leather-laced shoes, black socks and matching belt.

weekends are jeans (1 pair of starting-to-fade dark denim + 3 lighter blue), plain t-shirts, polo shirts, 2 cargo shorts and sneakers with white socks (eek!)

oh, accessories include a cell phone with belt holster, and bulging leather wallet in pocket, lol. i don't think the man-purse will fly!

so far, i'm thinking:

1) pants = flat front chinos/ some other 'tropical weight wool'?; dark denim straight/bootcut (brands?)

2) shirts = wrinkle-resistant, short sleeve button down for work

3) shorts = bermuda (khaki, stone and/or brown?)

4) shoes = leather fisherman-type sandals (durable brands with moisture wicking + 8 hr. performance?); fashion sneakers (brands/styles?); brown
leather shoes for work?

he is a very frugal man, and would never buy something as 'frivolous' as clothes/shoes for himself i gifted him with an authentic navy pea coat for fall/winter (which he wore ALL the time...and paid me back, heehee), along with a few others with my guidance (ie, dark denim, dressy shirt for dinner/parties, nice black laced leather shoes for work, etc...)

i think he'd look smashing (and not at all awkward) in a euro-inspired, classic wardrobe. our dream honeymoon would be paris, france and it would be fun to at least recreate a reasonable, functioning frenchman's look in lieu of actually being there!

he has black hair, dark brown eyes, olive complexion, fit-average build, a little soft in the tummy because we love to cook/eat together

any game plan strategies? good deals? priorities?

thanks so much. can't wait to hear what you think.

Dressing

23 replies

Latest reply was from Angie

April

Veteran

Let us know if you hit upon any good strategies for getting him to try flat fronts. My man, who is completely and totally supportive of my own efforts toward style, is deeply resistant to giving up his pleats...

garmenta

Many men hate to shop--they'll be happier having a root canal without anesthetic--so anything you can do to make it easier for him to see clothes you think would work for him and decide if he likes them would be helpful. Have you tried emailing him links to looks and labels that he might like (or browsing online with him--whichever both of you would prefer) and asking him what he thinks? It's a way to "pre-shop" without leaving the house and having to try stuff on. You could also identify a retailer for an initial stop, once he's ready to go the brick-and-mortar route.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Does bf have to wear khakis daily?

shiny

Veteran

I'm so NOT the right person to ask about menswear, but I will relay my DH's opinion on one part of this. I don't know if he's correct or not, but here goes for what it's worth:

He says that men should only ever wear long sleeved button down shirts. If your BF prefers short-sleeve, then he should stick to polos and other knits, not wovens.

Otherwise, I stay out of my DH's fashion decisions. I try to influence on the side, but he ultimately has to make the decisions on his own. And he evolves his style at a glacial pace.

As a plus, after years of gentle influence about his shoewear, he just bought a brand-new pair of gray Con's. Woo-hoo!

Sarah

(website)

Veteran

Omiru has been a huge help for my husband's wardrobe:
http://www.omiru.com/index.php/category/men/
Yesterday my husband was wearing a wide striped polo in lavendar and slate with white jeans and boat shoes and Ray-Ban Aviators. I about melted it was so hot.
Bryan's favorite stores are:
Fossil
Gap
Nordstrom
Saks (Michael Kors pants and Theory shorts and polos are some of our favorite finds there - on sale of course)
Banana Republic
Zara
I will check Omiru and these stores for wardrobe inspiration and outfit ideas frequently.
Good luck!

cyan45

april, he does wear flat front chinos for work (my idea, hooray!), and they look great. they are in a khaki color, but it's a start

garmenta, excellent idea! i have used this technique for some time (and promise to treat him to something he likes to do afterwards--like visit the bookstore or get an gelato/tart yogurt, lol).

angie, i don't know if he needs to wear khakis every day. as a silicon valley software engineer, his workplace dress code is business casual (slacks, button down/polo, dress shoes, belt, etc...) anything that would make him look a little more smart & polished would be greatly appreciated!

shiny, interesting opinion about short vs. long sleeve. unfortunately, my bf gets hot easily, and supremely dislikes it. short sleeves minimize the fuss. he is a little picky about work shirts: short sleeve, 1 pocket for a pen, collar, button-down, in a pattern/color he likes. i'm all ears for possible alternatives.

sarbear, wow, AWESOME SITE!!! i'll be sure to check out the other stores you mentioned as well...what kinds of shoes and shorts does you husband wear? i'm reading that clean-looking bermuda shorts and leather sandals (either fisherman or thong) are pretty standard.

thanks so far everyone!

Sarah

(website)

Veteran

Bryan wears shorts mostly from American Eagle, believe it or not. The flat front non cargo styles fit best. He has also found some at the Gap. His favorite polos are Gap as well.
For shoes, he does wear thong sandals frequently because he believes that every true Austinite will always wear them. I can take him out of Texas, but I can't take Texas out of him. His are Fossil and we try to replace them when they start looking shoddy. He also wears vintage Asics with shorts and short socks. He has these:
http://www.zappos.com/n/p/p/126799/c/174495.html
For work, he wears pinstripe or glen plaid chino style pants and polos in the summer. For work shoes, he wears
http://www.zappos.com/product/7343928/color/691
http://www.endless.com/dp/B001.....34-0709852
He swears to me that they aren't too hot for our 100 degree temps. Which I guess makes sense considering cowboys wear cowboy boots year 'round.
We also like Martin + Osa, as it's a bit more grown up than AE for things other than shorts or polos. Express also has good work clothing as well. Lately, Fossil has also had a lot of good apparel for men. One idea is to roll long sleeves up to elbow length. Bryan does that as well. He would agree with Shiny's husband as far as short sleeve wovens. He is not a fan for some reason. Bryan is 28 but works in an environment with men twice his age. It is important for him to dress maturely, but still reflect his personal style and age.

Sarah

(website)

Veteran

PS: Bryan also loves to work with different colors. His latest "addiction" is his mustard yellow leather belt (Fossil). It's so fun how much interest that pop of color creates in his casual or business casual outfits.
We aren't pros, cyan, but I'd be happy to take pictures of Bryan's outfits for a week to give you an idea if you'd like.

cyan45

thanks so much sarbear! i would LOVE it if you can somehow document your hubby's weekday wardrobe, but only if it doesn't annoy him i'd love to recreate your husband's functional, youthful wardrobe, with my bf's personal tastes and workplace needs in mind.

btw, i love how you put outfits together this forum has helped me improve my fab-awareness (and budget) tremendously!

thanks again for all your help...

Anonymous

I'm with Shiny on the short sleeved woven shirts...not a good look. My husband wears long sleeved wovens and rolls up the sleeves. If you can't get him to do that, I'd try to get him to switch to high quality knit polo shirts with short sleeves. You can find them with a pocket. The ones with at least some synthetic in the fiber content don't fade as quickly and are less likely to shrink.

cyan45

joy, thanks for your input. i'm looking around for long-sleeve, buttoned shirts with a POCKET, but it's a little hard to find so far

what kinds of breathable, comfy dress pants are best for spring/summer (cotton, chino, khaki?) i'm so lost, lol...

cciele

Veteran

Interesting about the short-sleeve woven shirt thing -- those and knit tee-shirts are about all my husband wears (he dislikes polos). His favorite clothes store is REI, if that tells you anything

My husband is also a Silicon Valley engineer, so I emphasize with you, cyan45. From what I can tell, having worked in the computer industry myself, is that most anything goes for the engineers. If you are higher up in the management chain, or need to meet with clients, you tend to dress nicer, but otherwise it's often jeans/khakis/cargos and t-shirts/casual button-downs for many of the guys. Your husband sounds like he's on the right path; perhaps an upgrade in fabrics and cut?

Steph

Veteran

I'll ditto what Shiny and Joy said about short-sleeved button-down shirts. If the shirt is going to be button-down, it should really be long-sleeved. My boyfriend gets hot REALLY easily as well, but he firmly believes a button-down shirt must be long-sleeved to be acceptable (it is okay to roll the sleeves up to the elbow, though).

If the issue is finding one with a pocket, go to Brooks Brothers. They are currently having a sale, and they have a ton of dress shirts with a single pocket. There is an added plus because many of their shirts are non-iron (and the patterns are classic and never go out of style). If he has to wear short sleeves, I think polos would probably be the best choice for work, although I do think that a button-down shirt looks so much more business-y than a polo.

In terms of other things to buy, I think that some lightweight flat-front wool pants are an excellent idea. My boyfriend wears these year-round. He used to buy most of his from Banana Republic, and then realized that if he waited for sales he could get Hugo Boss pants from Bloomingdales, Nordstrom or Saks at the same price, and the quality was much better. I would definitely scour the finer department stores for flat-front dress pants.

For shoes, I think you are totally right about getting him into some sandals. I also think that a nice men's flip-flop would also be perfectly fine to wear with shorts (I know some on this board might disagree with that!). For fashion sneakers, I think something like Cons would be fine, or really any brand that looks a little more "fun." I know a lot of guys who really like Merrells.

shiny

Veteran

Pocket and short-sleeve = engineer! But of course. I have worked with engineers my entire career and was even married to one for awhile. I know the type well.

I currently work for a silicon valley computer company (but remotely) and if it helps, I have noticed that our HQ has moved from business casual to smart-casual-plus. This includes the software engineers, not just the "suits in management." The branch I work for is not in CA and is MUCH, MUCH more casual - what you usually think about when you think computer company. But HQ... you see a lot of suits, dress slacks, skirts, pumps... and only dark-washed jeans. Jeans are actually rare.

This has been a trend I've noticed over the last several years -since the dot.com bust. Probably because of the dot.com bust? Slowly getting more and more formal. I find I have to step it up myself when I go out there. You will even see suits now. Most of the men I work with, at HQ, wear jackets to work (either over khakis or jeans).

So you might mention that to your bf. Ask him if he's noticed that people are dressing sharper than they did pre-2001. Sometimes we get stuck in a rut and we stop noticing those around us, and what they are wearing. I think men are much more guilty of this than women. Know what I mean?

shana

Veteran

I third the opinion on short sleeve wovens. I personally have never liked the look at all and was happy that my husband was in complete agreement. He is also a not too far off convert to the flat front trouser look (took a little wheedling on my part). My husband dresses very typical dressy Euro. Back when the two us were silicon valley engineers (pre-dot com bust though neither of us were in s/w), he was typically the dressiest one in his office - he always wears slacks & a button down shirt. On dress down days he would wear a polo and khakis. He likes BR, Brooks Brothers, Ralph Lauren, Kenneth Cole & Martin & Osa and ironically his favorite cargo shorts (which he wears very rarely) are from Quicksilver! He likes to wear well made dress shoes (and doesn't mind paying alot for them) or sporty hiking type sneakers from Merrell, Columbia etc. He rarely wears sandals but when he does, he wears birks (yes, he's German, what do you expect?). At least I got him to stop wearing black socks with them!

Kari

Veteran

Sarah, my significant other has the same name spelled the same way as your husband. Hehe. Thank you for posting his recommendations for stores, even though they weren't directed towards me.

I am taking note of all these menswear threads. I feel kind of funny starting one of my own because I wouldn't want my boyfriend asking questions about me on the internet without my permission, but since he's asked my opinion as a shopping buddy in the past, I am trying to help him a little at a time as his budget and lifestyle needs allow.

cyan45

wow, great comments so, the (almost) consensus seems to be:

1) long-sleeve button shirts w/ pocket, sleeves rolled up
2) flat front dress pants for work
3) fashion sneakers
4) leather sandals

in addition to phasing in dress pants and long-sleeve button shirts into his work wardrobe, i seem strangely obsessed with leather fishermen's sandals, lol. he is very practical, and for some reason these sandals might fit the comfort vs. long-hours issue (i am thinking long walks, sightseeing, etc).

sometimes nowadays i see foreign techie-men (eg, indian and/or asian) wearing this kind of sandal, and am totally fascinated.

have i lost my mind? am i quickly falling into an 'old grandpa look' for my poor, unsuspecting bf? ;-D

Dashrashi

Veteran

Yeah, sandals for guys...I'm not a big fan. I do think it tends to make them look like old-man-tourists. I'd much rather see a guy in nice flip-flops than some sort of overwrought, overthought sandal.

Sarah

(website)

Veteran

Bryan is also a computer guy! He's a network engineer for a very large company based here in Austin. He spends most of his time at a desk looking at graphs and what not, but occasionally he does have to crawl around on the floor or take apart a server. So while he dresses nice, we never spend too much on his clothes because he's had some get ruined at work.
It should come as no surprise that he's the nicest dressed in his office. Computer guys aren't known for their fashion sense.
In the summer, Bryan wears finer polos with chino style pants. But occasionally he does go out to the field and likes to dress nicer out of respect for the end client. He wears dress button downs and nicer slacks. And in the fall and winter months, he wears wool blend pants (Banana Republic mostly) with button downs and cashmere pull over vests. He always wears his nice watch (an engagement gift from me), nice sunglasses (a must for us!), and nice belt and shoes. He is also not afraid to wear any color, so his wardrobe is far from uniform. Most of his pants are textured as are his tops, and he's learned from Clinton Kelly that he can wear two textures as long as they don't compete.
I took his first photo today. He was a good sport.

Sarah

(website)

Veteran

Not sure what your guy's size is, but these are some fab pants at a fab price. http://www.fossil.com/webapp/w.....=MC3927060

cciele

Veteran

I like the fisherman sandal look, as long as it's without socks!

Here are some sportier models:
http://www.rei.com/product/780334
http://www.rei.com/product/764754
http://www.zappos.com/product/7368622/color/10597

More upscale:
http://www.zappos.com/product/7382038/color/103
http://www.zappos.com/product/7296952/color/89290

Steph

Veteran

I'll add one more to the men's sandal suggestions. My boyfriend wears these by Keen--they have the fisherman look, but are modified with the open back. I think that makes them look younger/less old man. I also prefer these to the Keen sandals that have the strap in the back, which I think tend to look very sporty, like you are about to go for a hike and think you might end up hopping a few streams.

I was really skeptical of these shoes before my boyfriend bought them, but they look good on!
http://www.zappos.com/product/7209711/color/130545

(Also, as I said earlier, I do think a nice flip-flop works well for men. However, my boyfriend hates having something between his toes, and I know a lot of other guys--and girls!--feel similarly.)

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Okay! Then dear BF needs to dress smart casually for work daily. Here is the post. Super fab:

http://youlookfab.com/2007/12/.....for-gents/

Make sure the shirts fit properly too:

http://youlookfab.com/2007/07/.....s-for-men/