A Guide to Elegance - Kick-off Thread

Inge

Hi everyone,

Welcome to this month's Book Club meet-up. We are talking about A Guide to Elegance - For Every Woman Who Wants to Be Well and Properly Dressed on All Occasions. Genevieve Antoine Dariaux, for years the directrice of the Nina Ricci salons, wrote this (now) retro style guide in 1964 and I'm extremely curious to hear what you thought of it.

I found it a very enjoyabe read and didn't mind Madame Dariaux's outspokeness and her at times cheeky tone. I do love a woman with an opinion, even if I don't share her views;-)

Even though some of the advice is now outdated, I love to read older style guides like this one, because they paint such an excellent picture of the (fashion) customs and lifestyle of a certain period.
E.g. One of the many things that stood out to me is the amount of thought that went into every single little detail of an outfit and the accessories, right down to the colour of the handkerchief.

I could keep on writing here, but over to you first. How did you like the book? How much of Madame Dariaux's advice still holds true for you today? And is striving for elegance one of your style goals, or is that not something you are interested in?
I'd also love to hear your definition of elegance. I personally find it quite hard to describe.

12 years ago

Book Club

13 replies

Latest reply was from Fruitful

Joy

Veteran

Elegance is definitely one of my style goals. As I get older, I value it more, but can't say that I can define it. I think posture, movement, grooming and attitude are part of it. Can someone be RATE and still be elegant?

12 years ago

jayne

Veteran

That was an excellent and surprising definition. I would automatically have described the clothes but I think you are right, Joy, elegance is not the clothes but the person. With not a hair out of place, you can be elegant in goth clothes. But with a mess of yourself, the most expensive clothes will not make a difference.

I am struggling on whether elegance is a style goal. I am definitely attracted to it, but it may not be something I want to focus on, because it is grooming and checking makeup and hair, walking a little slower, taking time for my appearance. Do elegant people take a break from that, does it ever become so ingrained that you can relax? What is the impression from the book?

12 years ago

RoseandJoan

Veteran

It is a long time since I read this particular book but I am a big fan.

For me elegance in style is quietly confident, refined, appropriate and simplistic. I love that elegance is not just the preserve of the young or beautiful and is something which can be learned.

I also agree with Joy, there are characteristics which are intrinsically linked to elegance such as grace and manners.

I do wonder if elegance is associated mostly with a particular body type or style persona?

12 years ago

MsMary

Veteran

I love this book! In fact, I have it displayed in my Woman Cave because it matches the decor so perfectly! LOL

I aspire to be dressy and put together and polished in my appearance, but I'm not sure my personality lends itself to actual elegance. I think I laugh too loudly and talk too much to be elegant.

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12 years ago

Vicki

(website)

Veteran

Oh, these are excellent responses on your question of elegance, Inge. Joy's description of "posture, movement, grooming and attitude" all hit the mark and Jayne's "elegant in goth clothes" or "with a mess of yourself, the most expensive clothes will not make a difference" expand the definition of elegance to characterize a number of intangible features.

First off, it's a pretty book with its aqua book jacket, as Mary Lou's post attests (is that you dancing in the b&w photo, ML?).

At times, I felt there was a haughty and elite air about Madame Dariaux, however, no matter how she expressed her opinions, much of it was fairly accurate for its time and a lot of the information still holds. For example, I love pearls of all kinds and they continue to be a constant and wearable classic. So, does the little black dress, although I would choose to wear mine with sleeves.

Regarding, "girlfriends," I'm glad that the author's somewhat cynical view doesn't concern me and that empowered women offer some of the most genuine support in life which I find essential for a full and rich life. I laughed at her homophobic comment as I find gay men to be some of the best dressed individuals around.

On quality versus quantity, Madame Dariaux is quite accurate. I often feel Europeans shop wisely and so many of us in the United States are pulled this way and that with all the fashion choices that are available to us, sometimes to our detriment. I would like to move in that direction of quality and choose a nice suit every few years, along with a beautiful handbag that will give me more mileage, rather than buying on a whim. Even adopting an easier, more care-free hairstyle is part of this picture.

I believe Madame Dariaux's advice offers a clear, streamlined and unburdened way to achieving our own personal elegance. One of her basic rules of elegance (p. 70) "is to discover your own best style and then to remain faithful to it."

12 years ago

MsMary

Veteran

Great insights, Vicki!

And yes, that is me and my "tap ladies" -- our teacher on the right, me on the left, the other classmates in the middle!

12 years ago

Meredith1953

Veteran

I am very attracted to the idea of elegance since I do feel it has a pure simplicity in line and a composed and restful quality about it. However, as much as I admire it I do not believe I have the temperment to be truly elegant. I am much more impulsive in my demeanor and borderline scruffy in my appearance at times.
@MaryK,
I love your woman cave! DH has the man cave (family room) already claimed and try to claim the living room but his "stuff" migrates.

12 years ago

CocoLion

(website)

Veteran

I read the excerpts on Amazon but didn't end up buying this book. Although it is probably unfair, I have formed an opinion without fully reading the book.

As you said Inge, this book seems to be of historical interest rather than meaningful advice to this modern American. I don't have the lifestyle where I need a good suit every few years. And I don't need another book telling me that the Parisian way is somehow superior to the American approach. I like to shop. I like to purchase things on whim. I am not interested in having one style that works and sticking to it. I like to be constantly evolving. Some days I like to be Boho, other days preppy, other days rock & RATE. I recently read an interview with Marc Jacobs and he supports this approach. Why be tied to one style? Why not dress to suit your mood. I feel this, as well as mixing high and low, vintage and new, is a more modern take on elegant, stylish dressing than that of the author's.

12 years ago

Astrid

Veteran

I read this book some time ago and like Denise said - I thought it was interesting to read from a historical point of view. I can't say that I was able to relate to most of it. But there were some interesting points, mostly about quality versus quantity like Vicki mentioned.

Some rules were really funny, e.g. only being allowed to use an umbrella when you're at least 15 years old.

I bought the book because I was interested in the concept of "elegance" for my style, but now I know that it's not so much elegance that interests me but minimalism. And although these two are somewhat related in my opinion, I don't feel like elegance is something I want to strive for.

12 years ago

Scarlet

Veteran

I really enjoyed this book. I find the direct tone of the author amusing, entertaining, even charming. I like direct people, even if I don't always agree with them. I think an idea that I am still fascinated with from this book is the concept of buying something really high end, like a coat or bag and then using it until it is well-worn. That to me is a kind of elegance because it would be buying something of beauty and craftsmanship and enjoying it to the last drop, which is different from buying a designer bag so that everyone knows how much money it cost (this is crass in my view). However, in this day and age, where does one go to buy things of true craftsmanship? I think even a lot of high end things are just pumped out in factories overseas and then marked up to a price fitting to the brand name. I would feel foolish spending money on that. It's often hard to know what one is buying these days and what went into making it.

How to define elegance? Elegance is grace, class, harmony in composition and movement. It's actually quite hard to pin down, isn't it?

12 years ago

RoseandJoan

Veteran

Very good point Scarlet, I think it is important to view the book in light of the end of WW2 and the rationing which prevailed on into the mid 1950's. With material rationed, items had to last, in fact my Mum as a child had two outfits, one for Sunday and a play outfit and this was the norm.

Although rationing had ended by the time this book was published the ongoing frugality of the people of the time is very much evident and of value once more as todays generation are expected to be poorer than their parents due to the wide spread economical changes.

12 years ago

Vicki

(website)

Veteran

This is really interesting to hear about the historical perspective on rationing and the customs and lifestyles that prevailed. Denise, I see what you mean about dressing for your moods and often I feel like I aim for "chameleon chic" and yet, like Astrid, I want to play with minimalism, but I'm not quite sure if that's my true nature. It's all unfolding as I go along. Scarlet, I love your thoughts on craftsmanship and the shift from making quality items that could truly be worn to the "last drop" to producing items from overseas factories with the idea of branding as the major sales motivation. Great discussion, so far. Anyone care for more tea or coffee? I'll make some.

12 years ago

Fruitful

Veteran

Vicki, I'd love a cup of tea and I'll pass around the bikkies:) I definitely want to discuss this book at an opportune moment so am reserving my spot in the conversation!

11 years ago

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