Currently, I mostly end up with the librarian look–long hair, glasses, practical boring clothes, pretty but small earrings. I also like that look where you have a colorful dress, sandals, and dangly earrings or a big hat, more of a romantic or crafty hippie look. And I don’t like those things my friends point out which on me would show way too much chest.

I’m also with Gina on having to figure out layers to deal with feeling cold including extreme air conditioning in the summer. I don’t actually like blazers or sweaters or the even less practical shawls, but I just get too cold without them.

Angie – thanks, I’ll get over to the forum and meet the lovely gals there. In the meantime, I think I”ll go on a shopping sabbatical until I can better determine the direction of my own personal style evolution. Keep on posting about this! Especially with the fall collections rolling out in the next month, it’s given me food for thought before I start shelling out any $$.

for me ‘balance’ is the keyword… i think that successful ‘personal style’ is usually a combination of different influences. and the challenge is finding how to combine those elements in the right way. for instance, angie wearing docs or a perfecto jacket while staying true to her polished, feminine style – that is the kind of balance i find so tricky!

Mamark, we are on the same wavelength about certain classic pieces: “I am not convinced any clothes are “classics” though. Something always changes to make that expensive, classic item look dated”.

Francesca, your feelings have been covered at least 100 times over on our forum. Check it out.

I think I have two modes of “personal style”:

The reality: What I actually wear due to lifestyle, age, body type, and other facts of life that can’t be changed

The fantasy: What I would wear IF any number of variables were true.

In my fantasy world, I would have magic feet that never hurt. I would have a small chest that would open up a world of necklines and shirt details that are currently unavailable to me. I could dress more spiffily without looking completely out of place. Fantasy is what I would wear IF my body type, age, lifestyle, financial and comfort issues were different. There are lots of things out there that are unquestionably “me” in terms of style, but one or more other factors prevent me from ever wearing them. But just because you won’t find them in my closet doesn’t mean I don’t adore them.

Reality is why I avoid a lot of the Twiggy-esque styles I so love. Reality is why I have learned to embrace a casual look, and use boho pieces to help achieve that. I don’t ever want to look overdressed when I’m out with my friends, or worry that I look older than I really am. Reality is why I don’t join the legions of stylish New York women frolicking around in amazing, agonizing shoes.

I am happiest when I find a magical place where my fantasy and reality merge together, like that H&M dress I just got, or a sweet pair of boots that are utterly my style and yet still comfortable and practical.

Then there are things that I appreciate on others, but don’t care for on a personal level (like Angie and boho). Romantic and modern classic style personas don’t evoke the feeling of longing I have for that Edie Sedgwick/ Twiggy look, so while I appreciate them, I never feel bad for not embracing them. I will never be attracted to a flowy, floral romantic skirt, so it never causes me any confusion. I will buy modern classic pieces, but I always have to make them “mine,” like getting a very classic-looking jacket from H&M, and then adding a giant flower pin to it (which I promptly lost, but anyway).

That was a very long response. Cheers to anyone who made it to this sentence!

Add to that, the fact that though I’m pretty much the same size & shape now in my mid-40’s as I was in my 20’s, I need to remind myself to dress more age-appropriately and not wear the same clothes a 20 or 30 year old would wear, even though I can fit into it. So I guess that puts me at a style crossroads, knowing how I want to dress (if I were dressing simply for myself), but not feeling free enough to go that route because of my more casual lifestyle, the way others around me dress, and adjusting for age-appropriateness. Finding quality clothes that fit isn’t the problem, it’s reconciling those issue above. Does anyone else feel this way???!!

I am not convinced any clothes are “classics” though. Something always changes to make that expensive, classic item look dated.

I like how you have adjectives to describe your style. I once read that you should recite your adjectives when deciding what to buy. I have tried this with mine – “Is this elegant? Is it chic? Does it look expensive and convey authority?” but sometimes I do get sucked into something that makes me smile, like that brightly printed long, full Anne Klein skirt that I’ve worn only once.

I like fitted clothes. I’m struggling to incorporate more volume into my wardrobe. I have some flared skirts, chunky sweaters, boxy jackets and some looser peasant tops that I wear from time to time, but I favor skinny pants, tapered and straight leg slim fit trousers, pencil skirts, fitted jersey and sweater dresses, and fitted sweaters, blouses and tees. This was a result of trial and error. I have a slim hourglass figure, tending towards an inverted triangle. It I don’t wear things pretty fitted, my curves completely disappear and I look waifish or boyish, which is a nice look to play with occasionally, but not one I prefer.

I don’t wear many dresses (except for stretchy jersey and sweater dresses). I would like to wear more, but with a long waist and inverted triangle figure, I can’t find many dresses that fit right. So I stick more with separate tops and bottoms.

I also favor bright colors, and combinations of colors. I discovered this through trial and error as well. I always knew I liked bright colors, but my mom tends to wear a more muted palette, so when I used to shop with her, she would always steer me towards the neutrals b/c they’re more versatile (In her words “they go with everything!”). As an adult, I would often buy the same item in a neutral and in a bright color. I inevitably wore the colored item more often, usually to the point of wearing it out, while the neutral hung in the closet, barely touched. So I started buying more colors and less neutrals.

As I’ve gotten older and started working as a professional, my overall look has changed to accommodate this, even in my casual style. Short skirts used to be a big part of my wardrobe, and now I have very few and don’t wear them too often. My clothes now, while still fitted, are a little looser and generally less revealing. I don’t wear strappy camisoles as much, or I’ll put something on top of the cami if I wear one. I wear jackets and blouses for work, so these show up with frequency in my casual outfits too.

The last big factor in my style – temperature. I’m always cold. In the winter, I’ll wear turtlenecks with scarves on top, and then a cardigan and a jacket. My pants need to be loose enough to put leggings underneath. I wear boots to accommodate heavy socks. Even in the summer (because of the air conditioning at work and on public transportation), I wear sweaters over and tights under my summery skirts and tops. I’m always layered, or have extra layers available to add on for warmth.