Like many I developed my individual style from my mother. But it is interesting to note that though my sisters have quite different styles to me, my mother’s influence is still evident. My older sister is flamboyant and dresses in bold colours while my younger sister prefers darker colours and the rock chick/boho look. I am much more conservative, preferring classic style clothes though I incorporate many of the current trends. Strange as is may seem I can see my mother’s influence in all her daughter’s styles. There is an underlying elegance and sense of what is appropriate that shows in each of us. The final differences for us seem to be our personalities and body type.

These days, I do have a clear idea of my own personal style, but it didn’t really come into focus until I hit around 30 when certain things happened in my life that helped further define me as a person … specifically becoming a mother and advancing in my finance career. Being a mother, I must be practical in my clothing and consider what will be comfortable, what will stand up to grubby hands, and what necklines or hemlines could my toddler use to possibly expose me! And my personality which is highly practical, logical, efficient, & conservative mirrors my job and is reflected in my work clothing, which makes up 85% of my wardrobe.

I lean toward feminine classic cuts, clean simple lines, few patterns, rich colors & special details. I love dresses. My wardrobe is highly mix & matchable and carries over from year to year because I don’t deviate and pick up lots of trendy things. I also go clothes shopping with a list, looking for specific things to complement what I already have. In the past, I’ve gone out shopping for nothing in particular, and have ended up with pieces that got stuck in the back of the closet because they weren’t reflective of me and I didn’t have anything to wear with them.

You know, I love Kate Hudson’s & Kate Moss’s free boho style. And I think Gwen Stefani rocks and always love to see what she’s wearing. But I’m not those girls and that’s OK.

What a great questions Angie! I do think I have a strong sense of personal style, but I am willing to try some new trends and twists. Body shape and lifestyle were probably the two strongest factors in helping me determine what I gravitate to — a short (5′) inverted triangle frame and largely casual lifestyle. My clothing choices are usually simple, often neutral or strong colours & not many prints. I depend on my wardrobe basics and ask my accessories (particularly bags and shoes) to make sure I feel current and take some risks. That’s where the things like animal prints and funky detailing show up.

Great topic, Angie!

My style has definitely changed through the years, and is still changing. Identifying my style sometimes feels like trying to catch a slippery fish.

But I’ve noticed consistent themes in the styles and details that I’m attracted to: funky patterns; interesting lines (e.g., asymmetrical); bright, cool-toned colors; a little edginess or surprise. So whatever my overall style is at the moment, I tend to add these elements.

I also like to try new trends. I’ll give something a shot a few times, but if I notice the particular clothes sitting in the closet, not being worn for several months, that’s probably a good indication that the experiment was unsuccessful. Also, if I continue to be self-conscious wearing a particular outfit, that’s another sign that it’s not working.

The YLF forum is a great place to test boundaries. Also, just observing the reaction of people around me helps. I dress primarily for myself, but I’m not immune to the opinions of others. So positive reactions will help me figure out what elements are well-received, and if there are any common patterns in the reactions: is it a particular color? a cut? accessories?

Sometimes it seems easier to say what my personal style is not rather that what it is. I have a much easier time looking at a picture of an outfit or an outfit on a person and saying, “Yes I would wear that” or “Nope. Not me” than I have when I shop. I think the racks and racks of clothes and the challenge of putting an outfit together in an original way overwhelm me. Right now I’m struggling in shopping because of the amount of the boho look, which is not me at all, but seems to be everywhere. I can’t get the label(s) to my style just right.

This is a really interesting question. I think sometimes you just have to try the trend and see how it feels on. But I do think that discerning the trends that will work for you is something you get better at with practice. (No wonder Angie is so good at it.) And practice is exactly the process of learning what will work for your basic fashion style, your body type, and all those other things we should take into account when we consider a piece of clothing.

For myself I definitely can recognize items that are “so me”. But the flip side is that I find myself sometimes passing on these items because I know I’ve moved on. I find fashion to be a really evolutionary process but that is what makes it so much fun.

Over the years I tried many different styles, but in the end what really helped me define my style was Sex and The City. I know it sounds silly, but it really opened up my eyes in terms of color combination. Until then, I played very safely with neutrals in the winter and pastels in the summer, just a cutesy wardrobe, nothing to write home about. So with the new outlook on clothes, I set out to redefine what I wore. First, I got rid of anything baggy. Then I got rid of anything I didn’t wear anymore. Then I went shopping! I always liked tailored, polished look so JCrew and I are a match made in heaven. I love pairing their style with certain trendier accents. And that is what my style is today and I really like it. There is room for improvement like in the accessories section (other than shoes and purses), but it’s a fun challenge that I am working on.
As far as testing boundaries, I believe that in order to have some hits, you gotta have some misses. So I will try things out and if I don’t like what I see as I catch a glimpse of myself throughout the day, I will not repeat it. This web site has certainly helped me expand my comfort zone, so it has become an invaluable tool.

This is such a good, though-provoking question and one I’m afraid I don’t quite know the answer to yet. While I definitely know which things are “me” (classic, feminine shapes in neutral or murky/dusky colours, very few brights and definitely no pastels), I’m not really sure how I arrived at this. I suppose it has a lot to do with what looks good on me, and of course trial and error.

I’m afraid that these days I don’t “play around” with my style that much. I spent four years trying everything that caught my eye during university (studying fashion), and I think that had a lot to do with the company I kept. All my creative friends kept inspiring me to do different things, and now that I’m slightly more removed from that world here in London, I probably don’t have as much fun with fashion as I could.

I do notice that when I visit my best friend in New York it’s like we regress four years; we borrow each others clothes like old times and really push our boundaries. I wore some really cool outfits when I visited her last month, but haven’t tried to re-create any since. She is also a great shopping partner as she constantly encourages me to try new things, and vice versa.

I would say what influences my style the most is my body shape. I have a big chest and an hourglass shape, so that means boho looks really bad on me. One also cannot pull of gamine (using one of Lucky’s categories) with a curves.

I have a wardrobe similar to Melody’s, and I have also taken to making a list of want and need items each season. I have totally rebuilt my wardrobe from scratch after a weight loss, so that was a great opportunity to let go of a lot of clothes that I would never buy now. I am discriminating and now I don’t buy something unless it fits or can easily be altered. I don’t settle for something that only looks OK, no matter what a bargain it is. (This used to be a problem for me.) My favorite store is Ann Taylor, both for look and fit. I like J Crew and Banana but their clothes don’t fit as well.

When doing trends, I have been influenced by In Style’s feature where they show how you wear a trend in your 20s, 30s, and 40s/50s. That shows how you can interpret a trend seamlessly into your own style. While the 20 year old might wear a leopard dress and the 30 year old a leopard blouse under a solid jacket, us older gals look great keeping the leopard to a bangle, shoe or bag againt an otherwise classic outfit.

This is a very thought-provoking question Angie and not one I am sure that I have really given in-depth thought to.

I know that I definitely have a style, but feel it is a mish mash of things from trendy to classic to bohemian, etc. When I shop I usually just go by what catches my eye. It has only been since I have lost weight that I have really started to try and evolve my fashion. Turning 30 also made me very aware that I needed a change and should stop shopping so much at the “teeny bopper” clothing stores, although I do find some good pieces there from time to time.

I have always loved fashion and feel that being a Makeup Artist the two kind of go hand in hand. Joining YLF has helped me tremendously and really forced me to re-think my style of dress. I have become more aware and am putting more thought into my attire. I don’t know if I have a signature style down yet, but I am working on it.

I do have a clear picture of my style, and feel like I can eliminate MANY trends out of hand … but as I learn more about myself and become more immersed in style and fashion, I feel much like the Budget Babe: Sometimes it’s hard to discern desire from peer pressure when it comes to trends. But once they’re on my body, THEN I can always tell if they’ll work or remain eternally wonky within the bounds of my established style.

Good questions, Angie!

My style choices are definitely influenced by my lifestyle. The clothes I wore in my early twenties were reflective of the fact that I was in college so I dressed very casually during that time. Once I started working, I had to invest in more work-appropriate clothing.

I feel like I have a pretty good idea of what my personal style is – at least with regard to what styles I know I feel comfortable in and what suit my body.

As far as testing the boundaries – YLF has definitely helped with that. I have definitely tried some new styles that I would not have considered before – for example, skinny jeans. Not everything works for my lifestyle or body type, but I feel I’ve made progress in at least trying new things.

I like to keep an eye on the trends and incorporate a few new pieces into my wardrobe, but overall I prefer classic and timeless pieces that will last for a while.

Good questions! I’m still working at finding my style. I knew (or thought I knew) fifteen years ago, but years of not shopping, of falling into the Seattle-mom style of clogs, t-shirts, jeans, of not paying attention to how I looked, has left me at the start over point. As a woman of “a certain age”, I now have to figure out not only which current styles work for me, but what is age appropriate. I have to admit that it sometimes kills me that the floaty, boho things I love don’t work on me anymore. But I’m determined to find out what will work.

I think I’m making progress, and I feel so encouraged when I get compliments. YLF has definitely been the catalyst in getting me out of my frump-rut.

Personal style evolves with your life. I think as you grow older and become more familiar with yourself as a person, you learn about what works best for your lifestyle and personality.

Personally, I admire a lot of styles but am learning not to purchase on impulse (which is often super hard!) because more often than not, those items are left unworn hanging in my closet. I am learning that I’m most comfortable in basics and I use my accessories and shoes to make my personal statement.

I agree with others, my style is influence by body shape, lifestyle, and budget– in that order! It is really difficult finding tops that work for me as a 36D, I have found that to be a big factor (pun intended?) in shaping my wardrobe preferences. No matter what my career I think I’d have the same overall style, but my career does constrain the options I have to express my style (e.g. no slippery, unstable heels, no open toed shoes, limited skirts & short pants, etc.). The comfort zone I am tackling now is dressing up more from time to time.. (but overall my style is the same as my casual look). It is also a matter of fitting in professionally– most everyone in my profession is so casual and I struggle with standing out in more ways than 1 (see above).

Sinead I am in the same boat with you as far as starting new with my personal style. I am starting over after being in the construction business for 20 yrs. Before that I was in mommie mode for several years. Basically I am 55 and starting over from the sense of being a teenager. How scary.
Angie, the post where you break down style for beginners have helped me immensely. I do not have a natural talent or the self confidence to make it work without help.

OT. My hat is off to you east coasters. I am at Top Sail beach outside of Wilmington NC. This is my first trip east of Texas. It is so beautiful here and warm. Gorgeous. The people are so very friendly too. We got here in the middle of the night and I have m fiirst case of jet lag.

I love this post, Angie. I haven’t really thought about trends since high school before YLF, and I mostly wore clothes that were pretty boring, if not downright ill-fitting and unattractive. With the help of people here, I hope that my clothes at least fit and flatter me, but I definitely don’t have a personal, individual style down yet. I know what kinds of things I like on other people, and I know what things I’m not (not particularly rocker, athletic, casual, trendy), but it’s hard for me to actually figure out what I am and what I can wear that still flatters me. I like Lucky’s Guide to Mastering Any Style because I find it easy to go through and figure out what I like. Out of the signature styles that I liked, bombshell was probably the best fit for my figure and tastes (my love of pencil skirts, heels, and femininity), but I also really liked the mod & bohemian. I find it very difficult to combine those different things, so I usually stick with things that I perceive as “safer.”

Wow, what a question. Very thought provoking and perfect timing in the midst of my own style evolution. I have wondered about that exact issue myself: how do I know if my unwillingness to try something is because it is “not my style” or from inertia itself and failure to grow and change? I think a person’s individual style probably has some deep roots that do not really come through until late 20’s-30’s, and usually can be better established then because other factors in life tend t start stabilizing then too–school,jobs, relationships etc. Prior to then, the experimentation that may happen goes along well with EVERYTHING in life changing!
I have never been boho at all but went through a phase of those broomstick skirts and I still love leather “ethnic” flats. I have never been rock and roll, and have NEVER been able to comfortably incorporate elements into my wardrobe no matter how many times I tried.
I think the willingness alone to try something outside your comfort zone will bring about style evolution, even if all it ends up doing is updating the length of your tops, or buying a new color. Evolution takes time! Not many 30 minute make-overs happening in real life

One of the reasons I found YLF was because I was struggling with my own personal style…even though I am in my 40’s. A year ago, I was living in SoCal and now I am in the Pacific Northwest. So between my own personal mid-life crisis and transplanting to a completely different climate and culture, I really was struggling with what to wear and how to express myself with my clothing. I have kept an open mind and allowed myself to experiment with different clothing ideas…like bow-front blouses which I discovered to be a horrible, horrible mistake for me. But this experimentation also allowed me to try a moto jacket…which I LOVED! I am now leaning towards a more edgier style that I never imagined would work on me. But it does and I like it. It actually reminds me of my highschool days when I was punkier and sassier with my style and clothes were so much fun. Although I don’t think I’ll dye my hair blue again!

I found a website called covet.com It has a little style quiz and then gives you a style category that suits you. It said I was Sporty Minimalist with Sporty Boho and Sporty Modern as sub-categories. I LIKE having these labels! When I last went shopping, I was able to look at an item of clothing and determine if it would fit into any of these categories. I feel like I now have a plan to build up a focused image rather than the haphazzard mish-mash of clothes I had been collecting the past 5 years or so.

I think my basic style is the same , only as I have gotten older it is much more defined and refined.

I have always been classic, and modest, with a bit of fun. That has not changed . I have just learned how to do it MUCH better now.

*Classy and Subtle* are the 2 words I try to apply when dressing.( A pencil skirt , turtleneck and heels can be classy,subtle & sexy)

Sporty, Trendy, Boho, Goth, Skater, Grunge and Overtly sexy, …. Have never been how I dress. Although I can appriciate when others choose to.

I wear a wide variety of styles, but there are definitely some things that surface again and again.

I like fitted clothes. I’m struggling to incorporate more volume into my wardrobe. I have some flared skirts, chunky sweaters, boxy jackets and some looser peasant tops that I wear from time to time, but I favor skinny pants, tapered and straight leg slim fit trousers, pencil skirts, fitted jersey and sweater dresses, and fitted sweaters, blouses and tees. This was a result of trial and error. I have a slim hourglass figure, tending towards an inverted triangle. It I don’t wear things pretty fitted, my curves completely disappear and I look waifish or boyish, which is a nice look to play with occasionally, but not one I prefer.

I don’t wear many dresses (except for stretchy jersey and sweater dresses). I would like to wear more, but with a long waist and inverted triangle figure, I can’t find many dresses that fit right. So I stick more with separate tops and bottoms.

I also favor bright colors, and combinations of colors. I discovered this through trial and error as well. I always knew I liked bright colors, but my mom tends to wear a more muted palette, so when I used to shop with her, she would always steer me towards the neutrals b/c they’re more versatile (In her words “they go with everything!”). As an adult, I would often buy the same item in a neutral and in a bright color. I inevitably wore the colored item more often, usually to the point of wearing it out, while the neutral hung in the closet, barely touched. So I started buying more colors and less neutrals.

As I’ve gotten older and started working as a professional, my overall look has changed to accommodate this, even in my casual style. Short skirts used to be a big part of my wardrobe, and now I have very few and don’t wear them too often. My clothes now, while still fitted, are a little looser and generally less revealing. I don’t wear strappy camisoles as much, or I’ll put something on top of the cami if I wear one. I wear jackets and blouses for work, so these show up with frequency in my casual outfits too.

The last big factor in my style – temperature. I’m always cold. In the winter, I’ll wear turtlenecks with scarves on top, and then a cardigan and a jacket. My pants need to be loose enough to put leggings underneath. I wear boots to accommodate heavy socks. Even in the summer (because of the air conditioning at work and on public transportation), I wear sweaters over and tights under my summery skirts and tops. I’m always layered, or have extra layers available to add on for warmth.

In my mind, this is the most interesting style question there is. The link between knowing yourself and learning to represent that in what you wear is so fascinating. As women, we go through so many stages in our lives, and take on so many different roles. We’re evolving, fashion changes … it makes for a lot of fun!

I’m better at eliminating colors than styles. I’m hard to fit, mainly due to height, so I’m usually so glad to find something that fits, I am inclined to buy it. This has led to unworn items moldering in my closet, and my biggest goal is to quit doing this.

I am not convinced any clothes are “classics” though. Something always changes to make that expensive, classic item look dated.

I like how you have adjectives to describe your style. I once read that you should recite your adjectives when deciding what to buy. I have tried this with mine – “Is this elegant? Is it chic? Does it look expensive and convey authority?” but sometimes I do get sucked into something that makes me smile, like that brightly printed long, full Anne Klein skirt that I’ve worn only once.

Very thought-provoking post, Angie. I *think* I know what my style is, but part of the challenge is that if I dressed to fully express my personal style it would be quite a bit dressier and edgier than what the suburban moms around here wear and I don’t want to stand out as too much of a clothes horse. So I find myself toning down my style to blend in a bit more with my environs. My lifestyle has also become more casual since I’ve gone from a investment banking corporate environment to stay-at-home mom six years ago.

Add to that, the fact that though I’m pretty much the same size & shape now in my mid-40’s as I was in my 20’s, I need to remind myself to dress more age-appropriately and not wear the same clothes a 20 or 30 year old would wear, even though I can fit into it. So I guess that puts me at a style crossroads, knowing how I want to dress (if I were dressing simply for myself), but not feeling free enough to go that route because of my more casual lifestyle, the way others around me dress, and adjusting for age-appropriateness. Finding quality clothes that fit isn’t the problem, it’s reconciling those issue above. Does anyone else feel this way???!!

This is such an interesting topic. Been thinking about how to respond.

I think I have two modes of “personal style”:

The reality: What I actually wear due to lifestyle, age, body type, and other facts of life that can’t be changed

The fantasy: What I would wear IF any number of variables were true.

In my fantasy world, I would have magic feet that never hurt. I would have a small chest that would open up a world of necklines and shirt details that are currently unavailable to me. I could dress more spiffily without looking completely out of place. Fantasy is what I would wear IF my body type, age, lifestyle, financial and comfort issues were different. There are lots of things out there that are unquestionably “me” in terms of style, but one or more other factors prevent me from ever wearing them. But just because you won’t find them in my closet doesn’t mean I don’t adore them.

Reality is why I avoid a lot of the Twiggy-esque styles I so love. Reality is why I have learned to embrace a casual look, and use boho pieces to help achieve that. I don’t ever want to look overdressed when I’m out with my friends, or worry that I look older than I really am. Reality is why I don’t join the legions of stylish New York women frolicking around in amazing, agonizing shoes.

I am happiest when I find a magical place where my fantasy and reality merge together, like that H&M dress I just got, or a sweet pair of boots that are utterly my style and yet still comfortable and practical.

Then there are things that I appreciate on others, but don’t care for on a personal level (like Angie and boho). Romantic and modern classic style personas don’t evoke the feeling of longing I have for that Edie Sedgwick/ Twiggy look, so while I appreciate them, I never feel bad for not embracing them. I will never be attracted to a flowy, floral romantic skirt, so it never causes me any confusion. I will buy modern classic pieces, but I always have to make them “mine,” like getting a very classic-looking jacket from H&M, and then adding a giant flower pin to it (which I promptly lost, but anyway).

That was a very long response. Cheers to anyone who made it to this sentence!

Wow, what a great topic!
I have to agree with Tammy; you do evolve as you get older, especially with lifestyle changes and body changes as you age/have children etc. When I was in my twenties I would wear more “out there” styles as I could get away with them. I sometimes see gorgeous styles that are very interesting and unusual but know that they would either look ridiculous on my or just wouldn’t fit into my lifestyle.
Now as a SAHM in my early forties I wear more “practical” clothes but still believe in looking stylish. I had my colours done a couple of years ago and found this to be extremely useful, especially as I dabble in sewing.
I have my own style where I know what looks good, and tend to stick in my comfort zone. It is good to sometimes step out of it: case in point; after reading an article on here about doing exactly that I went out and bought a pair of groovy cowboyish boots that I saw on sale; not usually my thing at all (and I was actually looking for plain brown boots), but I thought what the heck. Now they are my favourite shoes and every time I wear them I get compliments galore. So thanks Angie for that article!
I think it’s a matter of trial and error but as you age and know yourself better it does become easier.

Lasses with their thinking caps on. Love it! Thanks for your insightful comments.

Mamark, we are on the same wavelength about certain classic pieces: “I am not convinced any clothes are “classics” though. Something always changes to make that expensive, classic item look dated”.

Francesca, your feelings have been covered at least 100 times over on our forum. Check it out.

Angie, i’m glad those comments led to this post… it’s not just the info you share, but how you apply it and put it all together, that is so interesting.

for me ‘balance’ is the keyword… i think that successful ‘personal style’ is usually a combination of different influences. and the challenge is finding how to combine those elements in the right way. for instance, angie wearing docs or a perfecto jacket while staying true to her polished, feminine style – that is the kind of balance i find so tricky!

Maya, you’ve articulated perfectly the tug I feel between fashion fantasy and personal style reality. Good post. Great topic.

Angie – thanks, I’ll get over to the forum and meet the lovely gals there. In the meantime, I think I”ll go on a shopping sabbatical until I can better determine the direction of my own personal style evolution. Keep on posting about this! Especially with the fall collections rolling out in the next month, it’s given me food for thought before I start shelling out any $$.

I know my style should take into consideration my body type (thin with subtle curves), my lifestyle (casual and comfortable), my thriftiness and lack of caring about what’s in (classic rather than trendy). I’m also learning that reflecting my favorite subcultures (hippie and geek) without offending other subcultures (fellow professionals, fellow visitors of fancy restaurants, etc.) would be good. I also like a very feminine look which, in its extreme (lots of lace, lots of pastel pink, lots of little flowers) is basically sickening to some people, so I try to go easy with that. Plus, at age 46, it’s extra inappropriate.

Currently, I mostly end up with the librarian look–long hair, glasses, practical boring clothes, pretty but small earrings. I also like that look where you have a colorful dress, sandals, and dangly earrings or a big hat, more of a romantic or crafty hippie look. And I don’t like those things my friends point out which on me would show way too much chest.

I’m also with Gina on having to figure out layers to deal with feeling cold including extreme air conditioning in the summer. I don’t actually like blazers or sweaters or the even less practical shawls, but I just get too cold without them.